MIND MOVES: A nod is as good as a wink. Or is it? Can you distinguish a sneer from a leer? Do you know what you show by those gestures or many other signals you may inadvertently send?
Each day, in a thousand ways, we communicate: not with words but in the non-verbal world of what is described as analogic communication, kinesics, paralanguage corporal communication or body language. And it conveys myriad messages about us. Each facial expression, eye dilation, lip elongation, brow raise, eye blink, wink, chin thrust, mouth purse, nose curl, teeth gnash or lip twitch sends a powerful communication to observers.
This is the information we express when we say nothing at all and it is received, read, interpreted and acted upon, often without recipients being consciously aware of what has triggered their response. Equally, we may be unaware we have provided such insights into our personal worlds. We may imagine that as a species we have replaced primitive communication with language. That is not so.
Psychologists affirm our capacity to send and receive non-verbal messages remains a powerful and primary communicative means.
As anthropologist Gregory Bateson noted, an important evolutionary stage was reached when we realised such signals can be "trusted, distrusted, falsified, denied, amplified and corrected", such as the poker player's inscrutability.
Forensic psychology includes analysis of deceptive signals. We shudder at the cold countenance of the psychopath, the premeditated murderer's impenetrability: the absence of signals of concern.
Women are reportedly more proficient than men at reading complex non-verbal cues. Children try to conceal telltale signals, giving themselves away in the process. Think of the hand-over-mouth surreptitious eating or classroom chat, the movements of stealth upon which mothers ask "What are you up to?"
Consider the over-attentive countenance when mischief is afoot, wide-eyed innocence and crocodile tears, or the gaze-avoidant guilty look so recognisable to teachers, even if one tried to brazen it out with a cheeky stare.
This confirms for children the truth of elders' claims to have eyes in the back of their heads or, in the words of Dante "if you had a hundred masks upon your face, your thoughts however slight would not be hidden from me".
Kinesics are evident from many terms woven into our vocabulary. Who could forget the range of childhood incidents precipitated by an inadvertent facial expression or body posture? How many children have been startled by an adult command to "take that smirk off your face" without knowing what precise facial expression warranted such a reaction?
Annoyance was also evoked by sullen looks, shifty or sly-eyed looks. Gaze avoidance causes universal discomfort but is also a defence in children being rebuked who are then told to look at the admonisher.
Dangerous too, among peers, was "gawking", provoking intimidating interrogation by bullies as to whom one was looking at? This required immediate eye-aversion, humble denial and swift departure elsewhere, unless one was foolish enough, or hardy enough, to engage in the inane "I'm looking at you, kangaroo" retort, that precipitated non-verbal engagement of a different kind! Ironically, fear of being disbelieved sends the same non-verbal signal as fear of being caught out. Who could forget the class interrogation of likely larcenists when items went missing from school lockers? The line-up of potential culprits identified the innocent more often than the guilty; less angst being the attribute of less developed consciences.
Adolescents often smile when anxious, conveying, incorrectly, amusement instead of stress. Adolescent embarrassment may be camouflaged by conspiratorial giggling, this attempt to save face often inspiring unwarranted wrath. Few would misinterpret the arrogance of hands on hips, the ennui of eye-rolling, the warning in a clenched fist, raised hand; the difference between a smile and gritted teeth or cold shoulder exclusion.
Charles Darwin's famous study, The Expressions of Emotion in Man and Animals, identified the universality of facial expressions of disgust, hate, sadness, shame, anguish and guilt. Others signs are cultural: thumbs up; fingers crossed; "V" sign versus two-fingered gestures; the Japanese greeting bow; proximal "tie-signs" such as holding hands; or grooming behaviours identifying closeness.
Disappointment is disguised by false signals of exaggerated delight; witness the Oscars, where nominees who do not win display more joy than winners. And the terms "postural echo" and "isopraxis" refer to our human mimicry of each other in manner and dress, audience response, team colours, fashions and fads to keep our plumage similar and connected to each other.
It is not just our eyes that act as windows to the soul. We are bound and bonded together by the universality of our experiences, our signs and signals, showing emotion, inviting courtship, conveying sympathy, enabling empathy, gestures of affection, appeasement and of peace.
We are more similar than different, more together than apart.
Marie Murray is director of psychology at St Vincent's Hospital Fairview Dublin. mmurray@irish-times.ie