Want to improve the way you spend your time? Kate Holmquist talks to the founders of a team which claims to know how
'If only I had more time" could easily be the mantra of the early 21st century. Time-poor and cash-rich, we're often frustrated by parasites devouring our time, time-wasting bosses who keep changing direction and family members making unreasonable demands. Six out of 10 women say there aren't enough hours in the day and one-third of people are unhappy about the time they devote to work.
Feeling out of control of our time is stressful and unproductive. Conversely, "feeling in control of our time makes us happy", says Octavius Black, a human resources expert and one of the founders of The Mind Gym, which was in Dublin last week to hold workshops.
Not a fan of pop psychology, Black was at a boozy dinner party when he and his friends got a brainwave: if the 1980s were about physical fitness and the 1990s about spiritual searching, then the 2000s were going to be about achieving the potential of the mind, since body, spirit and mind are a triad.
The result was The Mind Gym, which has delivered its workshops to 100,000 people in the UK, US, Europe and Australia. It has 33,000 online subscribers. The Mind Gym book, published last year, was a best-seller.
"Self-help books tend to be based on ideas that are not rigorously researched," says Black. "Yet rigorous practical psychology is inaccessible to the layman. So we decided to find a way to bring rigorous practical psychology into the workplace. Practical psychology aims to help well people."
The second book, The Mind Gym: Give Me Time, has just been published. Unusually, as in the first book, no authors' names appear on the cover. Black says The Mind Gym isn't about personalities.
It operates as a co-operative with an academic board, whose members include four university professors who are also fellows of the British Psychological Society.
The key concept of The Mind Gym - Give Me Time is simple: most people operate on autopilot, thinking and behaving in similar ways, even when these habits are not getting them what they want. By spotting and changing mental habits, people can achieve more in less time, gain energy, have less negative stress, resolve difficult challenges, win people around to their point of view and enjoy life, rather than seeing it as an uphill struggle.
The book is even designed for busy people who have no time to read it: readers can dip in and out, concentrating on areas they need most help with.
People fall into one of two categories: time hawks and time doves, according to the Mind Gym's experts. Time doves are happy being busy and accept that there will never be enough time for them to achieve everything they want to. Time hawks are maddened by having to make decisions about how to spend their time. Frustrated by having to choose, they are destined to feel miserable.
It's obviously preferable to be a time dove, but the most successful doves are not resigned to their fate. They still strive to find ways of getting the most out of their time. These are called "striving doves" and that's what Mind Gym wants you to be.
It's a myth, says Black, that doing more in a shorter period of time frees more time for you to do other things. Slowing down is far more efficient, especially when you're in a hurry.
For example, rushaholics often pride themselves on thinking on their feet, but they are more prone to bad decisions that will need revision. Rushaholics tend to judge others on gut instinct, often wrongly. Mind Gym gives the example of a London gallery owner who cold-shouldered a woman who walked in off the street, because - he believed - people coming in off the street were never serious buyers. The woman was Yoko Ono, a serious art collector.
In business, rushaholics may be too anxious to launch a product. The first mobile phone and first personal computer were marketed by Xerox, but it was subsequent companies which built successful brands, since they took the time to learn from Xerox's mistakes, to develop their product and to market it.
Another example: drivers go fast on London's orbital route, the M25, believing they will arrive at their destination sooner. Research measuring the pace of drivers on the M25 found that slower drivers got to their destinations faster. Similarly, doctors who spend three valuable minutes talking to their patients about their care decisions are less likely to be sued.
Research has also found that efficiency is related not to how much you do, but to when you do it. Everyone has a concentration curve - certain times of the day when their brains are operating at top capacity and other times when mental energy lags. The high-peak times should be devoted to important, focused work requiring high concentration, rather than making phone calls and sending e-mails.
"Taking a long time to do something doesn't always mean that the end result will be good. Often, you get the best results working quickly when your mind is at its peak. You can ruin the result by going over it again and again," says Black.
Other people can be harder to control, as anyone who has a time parasite in their lives knows. A time parasite is anything that demands your time unreasonably: a late train, a long queue, a faulty computer, a misplaced remote or a niggling worry. Is your mother a time parasite? She could be if she keeps calling and interrupting your work, but she's a time generator if a chat with her at the end of the day helps you laugh away stress.
How to cope with time pests
Dead time: Flight delays, stalled trains, doctors' waiting rooms, hanging on the line - just a few of the ways that time is stolen from us. Use it well by being prepared for it. Have your to-do list handy, there may be something you could be getting on with
Interruptions: If you always respond by giving time, if you always answer a ringing phone and respond to e-mails quickly, then you're your own worst enemy. Others get used to your quick response and expect it always.
Persistent offenders: Friends, colleagues and family may regularly help themselves to your time, but they use it poorly. Examples of such pests at work include the indecisive boss who keeps changing the brief, the unreliable colleague who doesn't deliver or delivers the wrong thing and the anxious delegator who demands time-wasting meetings and progress reports.
Anxious delegators: They don't trust you to deliver what they want. Clarify, produce a plan, give them what they want and provide updates, thereby pre-empting their interruptions.
Meanderers: Often they take your time because it makes them feel important. Address their identity needs by massaging their egos through flattery and offer a little self-deprecation - "could you explain this simply please?"
Chatty people: enthusiastically explain that you're excited about an important project that has to be completed immediately, thereby impressing upon them the importance of your time.
Pushy people: "Are you going to want money from me at some stage? I haven't got any for you. Goodbye."
Needy people: Coach them on how to be self-reliant. If they work for you, be absolutely clear about what you expect.
The Mind Gym: Give Me Time (Time Warner, £16.99).