The debs is the last hurrah for secondary school students, but it's important to keep it all in perspective
THE LEAVING Certificate is well over, Hersonissos survived, new courses started - but for some, there's still one event left to draw the line under the school days: The Debs.
Parents and guardians worry about excessive drinking, intrusive security and the cost of it all, but for the students some of the more pressing worries are about finding a date for the evening and surviving the mixed emotions of an often over-hyped occasion.
The debs is a real rite of passage for teenagers as they move into adulthood, according to Kay Gilliland, a family therapist.
"There's the excitement of a new adult life ahead and sadness at the end of schooldays. This is expressed indirectly through the hype of the debs," she says.
"It's like a wedding in many ways, with the tears and laughter and there is a huge build-up, with all the fuss about looking your best. Afterwards, though, the kids can feel a bit flat."
Unlike a wedding, the debs partner is only for one night and her advice is to find a someone who is a friend and not just a handbag or arm candy.
"You need a partner who won't mind if you go off and sit with your friends for a while without feeling abandoned. A boy or girl who knows you well, not someone you've kissed a few times who won't understand your being emotional," says Gilliland.
However, she says it is important to be clear about the contract before you go. "They can't just dump you 10 minutes after you get there, or go off snogging your friends."
Recent debutante Alison Doherty from Wicklow says that the biggest stress for most girls is finding a nice guy.
"I went with a blind date and it was the best ever. We met through a friend but had never had a one-to-one conversation before. You wonder if they are going to stay with you and if they wander off you're wondering where they are. A good date must be there for you," she says.
Doherty had been to two debs before and said she had more sense this year, especially when it came to the dress. "Some really expensive dresses costing about €600 got wrecked last year doing Rock the Boaton the floor."
The stress is reaching its zenith at the moment, according to Keith Broni from Malahide, with everyone texting everyone else about it.
"The big thing for lads is finding the right date for the night. You want someone who's going to look good in the photos and it's even better if she has a friend there so you can be with the lads.
"A lot of guys have asked someone they used to go out with, but don't any more, and that can cause problems."
Money worries are high on the agenda, not only for the parents, but also the debs, he believes. "Shelling out for the night is difficult this year as it has been hard to get even a little part-time job and people don't like to keep asking parents. The tickets are €180 for two and you also need about €50 for drink."
Sixth year year-head Tony O'Rourke from Malahide Community College looks forward to the debs every year and says he's noticed an improvement in the maturity of children going to it in recent years, which he attributes to the higher numbers doing transition year (TY).
"Over 90 per cent do TY. The kids would not have been so well behaved years ago. They do all the organising and they love to see the teachers coming along on the night," he says.
One school, Coláiste/Gael-choláiste Choilm in Ballincollig, Co Cork, has found a solution to many of the problems associated with debs over the years - as only students from the school attend (without partners) together with parents and more than 40 teachers.
"There were some eyebrows raised when we started this model in 1992 but it has been an unqualified success," says the school's principal, Pat Kinsella.
"I had worked in other schools where the debs was fraught with difficulties," he says. "In theory, the school was running the event - but in reality had little control because you could not vouch for partners."
Kinsella says a significant number of students at the school would have been bringing along someone for appearance's sake. "It used to cause upset for those who did not have a partner and felt at a disadvantage. Temporary liaisons invariably broke up."
This way, he says, all who journeyed with the kids celebrate together.
"Getting the parents to leave at the end of the night can be the hardest part because they are great friends."
Security screening for alcohol and drugs is commonplace and an issue for many debs. The girls' handbags were searched on the way in at Alison Doherty's debs. "They separate the girls and the boys, but you can understand where they're coming from. It helps when the security is good."
Andrew Nolan's Venue Solutions company organises 53 debs dances in Wicklow, Dublin, Meath and Kildare.
"We hire a security firm to search at the door for drink. We also check to see if the mobile phone turns on, as this can mean that drugs are being smuggled in the battery cavity. In general, we are seeing very little of it this year."
Nolan hasn't seen hash in 10 years at debs dances, most likely due to the smoking ban and ecstasy is also gone.
"There is no cocaine problem evident in this generation, possibly because of the high profile media cases," he claims.
Nolan runs many "all-night" debs. The bar closes at 2am and because of this he says the kids have to pace themselves better and there isn't a mad rush for last orders.
"The spend is different and they seem to be drinking in moderation more. There's three hours of dancing with no drink although we do supply plenty of water and serve breakfast in the morning."
His advice to parents is to watch out for uncontrolled drinking before they go to the venue in the limo or at reception. "Sometimes at receptions in the school or in houses, bottles are left open on tables. If the girls are very slight, a couple of glasses of champagne can go to their heads early on and ruin the night."
It's a long day and it is important to be able to pace yourself, Gilliland advises. "Don't expect it to be perfect the whole time. It won't usually finish until dawn, so it's important to get a good night's rest beforehand."