HEART BEAT: Another dire weather prediction may come to pass this afternoon here in the south west. I sincerely hope not, as I am due to play golf. God how I miss work and I envy all you lucky people in whatever working environment, as you prop up the national economy, writes Maurice Neligan.
The fruits of your labour will be wisely used by the Government for the betterment of all, and you may feel justly proud of your contribution. Our cat has just laughed outside the window. I wonder why?
I am mentally preparing to return to the metropolis from my refuge on the Iveragh Peninsula, apparently one of the healthiest places on earth. Charles Smith in Ancient and Present State of the County of Kerry, refers to Mr Daniel MacCarty, who died in 1751 at the age of 112 years, having lived all his life in this barony. He buried four wives and, at the age of 84, married again to a girl of 14 years and who survived him with their several children.
He apparently drank great quantities of rum, but also walked eight to 10 miles a day. Mr Smith surmises: "Thus it appears that there is no habitable place, but where some constitutions, especially such as are inured to it, will weather life to an old age, with almost any method of living."
He continues by giving instances of longevity in other climes, amongst both the abstemious and the profligate. This book was published in 1756 and I am sure that if Mr Smith were to revisit us now and read the healthcare section of this newspaper, that he would be very interested.
He would find those who advocate only organic foods, or those who adhere to one diet or another, or those who chop up the doormat for use as a breakfast cereal (bulk, you know) all seem to claim that their recipe leads to the amelioration of all worldly woes.
There is a story here about the cub reporter on a local newspaper who plagued the editor for permission to write a feature article. Finally, he directed her to a residence for senior citizens with a brief to interview the oldest men therein and to ascertain the secret of their longevity.
On approaching the first old man, he told her that he was 104 years old and that he felt his long life was due to total abstinence, no tobacco, hard work and the fact that he never married.
Impressed, she turned to the second man and repeated the question. His answer was identical: no drink, no smokes, no sex and lots of hard work. He was 94. The last old gentleman looked considerably older, and the enquiry was repeated. "I'm not like them other bucks at all: I drank all my life, never worked a day, smoked at least 40 a day, and chased every woman in the town." And what age are you Sir? "Begod I'm nearly 58," was the reply. I think Mr Smith would have understood that. In passing, it is noteworthy that amongst the ranks of the senior citizens, the ladies far outnumber the men.
There are sound medical reasons for this, and you must disabuse yourselves of notions that the women do less work, or that the men are nagged underground earlier. Such thoughts would be unworthy and certainly not politically correct.
The amount of medical information in Mr Smith's book is remarkable. Chapter 11 is devoted to the medicinal waters of Kerry and their analysis. Some of the claims for their efficacy would sit well in the present time.
Dr William Collis observed one spring that an earthworm placed in its waters soon died! Drunk in quantities of three pints to two quarts, it had a diuretic effect. Using more than this could be purgative, and really hogging it could be emetic.
From my student days, I had thought that these were properties of beer, and had I known of the above, I could have told my late mother that I was suffering from a bad glass of water.
This remarkable water cured jaundice and disposition to dropsy. It also cured tabid habits - whatever they are. It helped in numerous other conditions. I don't know where to acquire this elixir now, but if I ever find it I am sure I need never work again. All this means little has changed in 250 years. We are still looking for the quick-fix to the problems of health. The reality is painstakingly slow research and development by those trained to do it, not the latest scatterbrained fad.
I suppose I become more tolerant as I grow older.
Dr Maurice Neligan is a cardiac surgeon