ANALYSIS: Even the Deity was invoked when the Bertie machine, now flagging a little, rolled into Dublin, writes Mark Hennessy
According to the bookies, Michael Noonan needs divine intervention if he is to become Taoiseach after Friday's poll. Yesterday Bertie Ahern even managed to close off that possibility.
Leaving Blanchardstown Shopping Centre, Mr Ahern and the local Dublin West candidate, Mr Brian Lenihan, ran quickly into the arms of Father Dan Joe O'Mahoney. Bringing the Gospel to Mammon, the well-known Capuchin friar runs an oratory in the shopping centre. "We are praying for you, Bertie!" declared Father Dan Joe.
Short of the heavens opening, Mr Ahern seems set fair to return to office after Friday, unless the public is indulging in the biggest con-job of politicians since democracy was an infant. Everywhere he went he was met with smiles and handshakes. Even when voters brought up issues which mattered to them, they appeared happy for Mr Ahern to nod his head with concern and share their upset.
One woman complained that her premises has been hit with a 91 per cent rise in public liability insurance. "I know. It's terrible. There are only four companies doing the business, and two of them are trying to ditch customers," replied Mr Ahern.
However, even the cutest of campaigners can come a cropper. Meeting three young lads, Mr Ahern was happy to discuss the merits of Manchester United over Arsenal. Ever ready to seek common ground, the Taoiseach went on: "Ah well, you can follow Dublin for the summer. Up the Dubs." The boys' mother chuckled: "We're from Cavan."
"Sorry about that," replied Mr Ahern with his best altar- boy face as he hurried away in search of the next voter.
Pauline Devlin from Ardpatrick Road complained about the Government's lack of funding for the mentally handicapped. "Don't put me off now," she ordered Mr Ahern, as he tried to interrupt her flow to detail the Government's achievements in the last five years. He nodded meekly and waited his turn.
The two parted politely. However, Ms Devlin, who campaigns for a charity operating out of Peamount Hospital in Dublin, was still unhappy. "He won't be getting my vote," she said.
Getting ready to leave the shopping centre, Mr Ahern was already looking forward to next week. And sleep. Even the famed Bertie Machine is beginning to flag after nearly three weeks on the road.