RADIO REVIEW:THE BLACK HOLE of Kildare Street is not what you think. It's worse. There was a lot of recrimination on the wireless: Brian Cowen needs to grow a pair, and start slashing. Those who took the income tax levy on the chin, who didn't vote for Fianna Fáil and those who never will, have been patiently waiting and hoping for the public sector reform to begin in earnest. We're still waiting, still hoping. Whether or not you believe it is a good/bad time for the changing of the guard, the finger-pointing won't help us now.
On Tuesday's Morning Ireland(RTÉ Radio One, weekdays), Ruairí Quinn said, "This is the worst Government that I have ever seen in my entire 35 years in Leinster House."
Brian Cowen tried softening news of the €8 billion tax shortfall by giving a preview on This Week(RTÉ Radio One, Sundays), but the exchequer data still hit the fan on Monday. All that was missing was a pantomime villain, perhaps in Pretty Polly tights, who would personify the Government's out-of-touch attitude. Beverley Flynn ably filled the role.
Flynn, who thrives even in the most scornful spotlight, told Radio One's News At Onethat she was "entitled" to her €41,000 Independent TD allowance, but changed her mind on Wednesday's The Tommy Marren Show(Midwest Radio, weekdays).
"I informed the Taoiseach . . ." Flynn said. I'm not sure that's how it happened.
"What is it about the Flynns?" a perplexed and exasperated
Matt Cooper asked on The Last Word(Today FM, weekdays). How much time, and how many more rotten tomatoes, has he
got?
Amid this farce, Brian Lenihan told Morning Ireland: "I think we've made it clear that payroll costs in public service can't be immune from the trends we're seeing in the wider economy . . . We see in the property market that the housing market is correcting itself."
Correcting? That is Magic Faraway Tree, Revolving World, Land of Take-What-You-Want, Enid Blyton territory. The housing price bubble was not an act of God. For those who live in the real world, especially first-time buyers, it is more than a correction.
But there is no payback. David McWilliams told Myles Dungan on Today(RTÉ Radio One, weekdays) there will be little personal loss for those who are part of this country's ruling "cartel".
Which is probably why so many senior bank directors continue to maintain a blithe it-was-beyond-our-control air about them. McWilliams added, "There were very few of us who said this was a huge bubble that was about to burst. We were ridiculed and laughed at. The bubble has now burst and we are facing what most countries dread."
McWilliams spoke in that slow, lecturing way that sometimes irks John Bowman. He savoured each word, sprinkling them with appropriate, if literal, imagery. He said the Government needs to make decisions before the markets tire of our borrowing. "You've got this ticking like a huge chiming clock inside Brian Lenihan's head . . ." I closed my eyes and imagined a town clock with two figurines: Cowen and Lenihan appearing on the hour with Waterford Wedgwood begging bowls in tattered green velvet MS lederhosen.
We certainly need a laugh. The Maroon Bros Good Time Radio Show(Newstalk 106-108, Sunday) had its fourth and final instalment. I lay back like a dog, paws up, waiting eagerly for my tummy to be tickled.
Produced by Kevin McCann, it's a series of madcap sketches. A man wants to buy a black wreath in the shape of a rat from a florist. He wants the inscription to read: "He's a dirty, stinkin', lyin', toutin', scumbaggin' former rat." The florist, of course, is an innocent. Cue: comedy? Alas, if only it were that simple.
In another sketch, an impatient journalist interviews a second World War veteran, Charles "Chucky" Morrison, who is on a ventilator and on his deathbed. Except Chucky is suffering from dementia and obsessed with shoes. Cue: comedy? Does innocence plus a satirical cold-eyed cynicism create observational comedy? Or sensitive subjects plus irreverence equal brave comedy? Of course not. You need more insight than that. Without it, the comedian risks becoming like that which he wishes to satirise.
In the real world, Cal Thomas told Tuesday's The Last Wordthat, having interviewed George W Bush, he found him upbeat and jovial. Cooper asked, "Was he out of it?" Thomas said, "He admitted he's been through some very difficult times."
He asked Bush if the banking bailout was against his free market principles.
Bush was reportedly told by his advisors, "If you don't do this, if you don't put money into the economy, if you don't do these bailouts, we're going to have a depression worse than the Great Depression."
Writer Tom DeFrank then said Bush is aware what many people think of him. "In the short-term I think he understands that he leaves office a very unpopular, discredited president . . . I think he's a very stoic guy, but I think that has to hurt a little bit."
On a more positive note, DeFrank added, "He's done as well as he could without much power left to him. He is convinced that his legacy will look better in 10 years or 25 years, and he's content to wait to be vindicated."
Well, at least there is someone happy to look on the bright side.
qfottrell@irishtimes.com