No Border bus bust-up; coulda been a contender; profit before people?; Ross’s back pages; new image; nation in red; Lydon love-in; birthday boys
Heard the one about Ministers in the minibus?
“CORDIAL BUT not jovial.” That’s how a source close to the minibus described the atmosphere yesterday when four Government Ministers found themselves sharing a charabanc from Monaghan to Armagh.
The quartet comprised Cowen loyalists Pat Carey and Brendan Smith, Mary Hanafin, who voted against Cowen in the confidence motion, and Eamon Ryan of the Greens – and they’re to blame for everything.
They were each driven in their State car to Monaghan, where they boarded the little bus that would take them to the headquarters of the North-South Ministerial Council across the Border. This is because any State car crossing into Northern Ireland must be accompanied by two PSNI vehicles. With so many Ministers travelling, a minibus is the only option.
The Taoiseach and Tánaiste arrived separately in their respective Government chariots. Otherwise the atmosphere on the bus would have been not jovial but poisonous, and the air more than a little blue.
Everyone arrived in one piece.
“Keeping well?” said Peter Robinson to Brian Cowen.
“Very well indeed,” said Brian to Peter, brave little trouper that he is.
Martin McGuinness looked on cheerfully, probably wondering how many of the five Free State Ministers might fall to Sinn Féin come the election.
There was a lot of interest in the event from Dublin-based journalists, but it had little to do with North-South relations and all to do with relations between Cowen and his mutinous colleagues.
The Taoiseach had a private chat with the First Minister inside the building before attending a plenary session of the council.
Did they compare catastrophes? “Funny old business, politics,” they might have mused. Twelve months ago in the face of personal, political and financial convulsions surrounding Iris Robinson and young Kirk McCambley, it appeared that Robinson was a man without a political future.
Today, it’s Brian Cowen who is facing the end of his career. Some observers say that the Taoiseach still believes he can emulate Robinson’s trick and pull off a Lazarus-like recovery for himself and Fianna Fáil.
“I have the support of my party as confirmed by democratic decision last Tuesday to lead this party in this election and beyond, and that’s what I intend to do,” he said. “The authority of my leadership remains.”
At this stage, Biffo’s heels are dug in so deeply you can only see the tips of his ears above ground level.
How times have changed since the first North-South conference in 1999. It included a younger, happier Cowen as minister for foreign affairs. Taoiseach Bertie Ahern’s Mercedes Benz headed the government motorcade into Armagh.
That procession of gleaming precious metal, as The Irish Times observed, had the appearance of a “Mafia wedding”.
The Southerners looked very tired. Biffo was in bullish form. He didn’t say so, but Conor Lenihan could say what he liked, and Labour could put down any confidence motion they liked, but he, Brian Cowen, Taoiseach, was “determined” to lead FF into the general election with a revamped front bench.
“Fianna Fáil will fight the election as a united party.” And he dug in his heels even further.
Mulcahy doesn’t want to sound vain but . . .
Speaking of revamped front benches, a lot of Government deputies were disappointed they didn’t get elevation to senior or junior ranks because of the meddlesome Greens and the muddlesome Cowen.
Michael Mulcahy of Dublin South Central was mulling over the events of the week last evening on the Scott Williams Showon Dublin's Q102. Scott mused that Cowen must have had people in mind for his new appointments before the Greens pulled the plug. Was Mulcahy telephoned, by any chance? "No, I was not," said Michael, sounding a little pained.
Scott wondered if Michael found this surprising. “Yes, I think it was. I had a lot to offer,” opined the TD. “I had a lot to offer – now, I don’t want to sound vain or anything – but I thought I deserved something.” But he refused to be drawn on whether his expectation extended to the half car or the full car. It’s immaterial now.
Sommerville and Ross for the southsiders
Oh, the blessin’s of God on ye, sirs. The bankers and stockbrokers and economists are coming to save us from ourselves.
The southsiders of Dublin are fortunate indeed, with a new episode of Sommerville and Ross about to begin in the leafy suburbs. Paul Sommerville, financial analyst and panel discussion darling, is going to stand in Dublin South East. Shane Ross, Senator, business editor and former stock broker, fancies his chances in Dublin South. They are standing as Independents.
Yesterday, another panel discussion stalwart, Peter Mathews, was “unveiled” by Enda Kenny on the Leinster House plinth. Unveiled? And with the weather so cold too.
Mathews is a chartered accountant turned banking expert. Ross is a stockbroker by trade. In fact, the actual economist among all the candidates lining up in Dublin South is Fine Gael’s Olivia Mitchell, who has a degree in economics.
Down the way in Dublin 4, Sommerville says he has the support of two prominent economists/pundits and noted shrinking violets Constantin Gurdgiev and Brian Lucey.
There has been talk of others putting themselves forward to form a loose right-wing alliance of the economically like-minded. It’s even been rumoured that David McWilliams is considering a tilt at a seat in Dún Laoghaire.
At the other end of the general election spectrum in Kingstown Richard Boyd Barret of People Before Profit is in with a shout for a seat. This has led to suggestions in Leinster House that the nascent business-bloc in Irish politics should call itself Profit Before People.
Return of the Fine Gael old guard
While the official campaign may not have begun, Election Eleven is already in full swing.
Grizzled old Fine Gael hacks, who melted away like the snows of spring during the party’s wilderness years, are suddenly reappearing around Leinster House.
Blueshirt suits that haven’t seen the light of day since the mid-1990s are being dusted off in readiness for the big return.
The dirt is beginning to fly. Particularly, but not exclusively, from those Fianna Fáil deputies who know their biggest threat comes from party colleagues.
And who wrote this in 2004? “As a shareholder in the Bank of Ireland, I am not too happy that the Governor lives in Paris. I am not at all happy that he is chosen from the Ibec/Bank of Ireland/sailing circle.
I am deeply unhappy that no outsider was given an interview. I do not believe that Richard is worth €300,000 a year as a part-timer.
“Did they approach Seán FitzPatrick of Anglo Irish? Far too dynamic. Anyway, he plays golf and fails the sailing test.”
It was Senator Shane Ross. And no, we don't have the time to be trawling through back issues of the Sindo. But a lot of people suddenly do. He must be ruffling a lot of feathers in Dublin South.
Gilmore’s band of style icons get a makeover
Meanwhile, the Labour Party hasn’t only been concentrating on its motion of no confidence in the Government. At the height of Tuesday evening’s heave drama in Fianna Fáil, Eamon Gilmore and his merry band of socialists took themselves off to a nearby hotel for a session with image consultants. Some of them, it must be said, looked rather reluctant as they trudged down Molesworth Street.
The deputies and Senators were closeted with two image experts for nearly three hours where they learned that they should project the right kind of sharp, professional image to the electorate. “It was grand, all very general stuff. The bleedin’ obvious, if you ask me,” said one of the participants afterwards.
Advice was given on hair and make-up and wardrobe choices. That must have gone down well with style icons like Tommy Broughan and Willie Penrose. We met prospective president Michael D Higgins yesterday and the session seemed to have worked – he looked particularly dashing in his rustic tweed jacket and daring masculine take on the slouched pillbox hat. Wonder if the party leader came away with any advice? If steps aren’t taken quickly, he’ll have to be dynamited out of that navy suit and red tie.
A bit like David Hasselhoff, our Chris
Breaking news from the Continent. The guest of honour at the Christmas party of Germany’s ruling Christian Democratic Union was none other than Chris de Burgh. After he crooned a few tunes (the man is still very popular in Germany, like David Hasselhoff) Angela Merkel thanked him for his efforts.
De Burgh's set list has not survived for posterity, but it doubtless included such favourites as Don't Pay The Ferryman (Germany Will Pay Instead), Nation in Red, An IMF Man Came Travellingand Patricia the Asset Stripper.
DDP goes head to head with the bould Ned
Eagle-eyed television viewers may have noticed Eamon Gilmore and the little Labour crocodile passing RTÉ’s David Davin-Power in the Leinster House car park as they returned from their Colour-Me-Red session with the image consultants.
The political correspondent was reporting live to the nine o’clock news on the result of the confidence vote in Brian Cowen. DDP was in full flow when an unidentified man edged stealthily into the frame and stood beside him, staring pointedly at the oblivious broadcaster.
Una O’Hagan, back in the studio, intervened. “David, I think there’s somebody there trying to talk to you,” she said.
The unflappable DDP turned to his left to see Ned O’Keeffe, Fianna Fáil deputy for Cork East, looking at him expectantly. Without missing a beat, he introduced the bould Neddo and conducted an interview with him.
Then Ned beetled happily out of shot and the broadcaster turned back to camera. “An important contribution there from Ned O’Keeffe,” declared DDP solemnly, not quite managing to wipe the smile from his face.
Don mends a few fences with Gormley
John Gormley was having a cup of tea and a bun in the Dáil canteen after his latest radio appearance when he saw an elderly man bearing down upon him with great purpose.
The smiling gentleman congratulated him heartily on his wonderful Pat Kenny interview. We couldn’t help overhearing him tell Gormley his performance was “very strong” and honest. John’s new fan was none other than former senator Don Lydon, back in Leinster House for a seminar on Dáil reform hosted by the Irish Parliamentary (Former Members) Society.
No wonder the Green Party leader did a double take. Don has had a major influence on the party, ever since that fateful night in 1993 when Trevor Sargent had a close encounter with Don in the chamber of Dublin County Council. He waved a cheque for £100 in the air, saying it had been sent to him by a developer. This caused consternation, with several councillors surrounding Trevor, demanding to see the offending instrument.
Don Lydon was very put out. “He was apoplectic to the point that he got me in a headlock, Taoiseach, and went to grab a mere £100 cheque,” recalled Trevor in the Dáil a number of years ago. It’s a night that will live in infamy as far as the Greens are concerned. So good to see Don mending his fences. John must have been relieved he was only holding a cup of tea at the time though.
Cork boys get a birthday bump from Cowen
Fianna Fáil rebels Billy Kelleher and Michael Moynihan were in great form on Thursday in Leinster House. Some thought the two Corkmen were taking a little too much pleasure in their leader’s predicament. (They are Micheál Martyr supporters.) It turned out that they were celebrating their birthdays – both have turned 43. They didn’t look half as happy when we saw them after Brian Cowen’s disastrous Dáil performance.
And from the trivia department: if the Government manages to stagger through to the March 11th general election date, the vote will be held on Mary Hanafin’s birthday.