Parties suffer builders' block

Ignore the noise and seek out the silence, says Miriam Lord

Ignore the noise and seek out the silence, says Miriam Lord

Where's Bertie Ahern, the Trappist Taoiseach? Anyone seen Mary Harney? And what of Pat Rabbitte, who normally can't pass a microphone without giving us the benefit of his wisdom?

All silent yesterday, while the haunted-looking Greens wilted after six days under the spotlight.

A still Bertie runs deep. In the uncharted depths of the Taoiseach's mind, anything could be going on. Even his own lieutenants are all at sea, which is how he likes it.

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Rule nothing in. Rule nothing out. Tánaiste Rabbitte? Perhaps. He was looking very relaxed around Leinster House yesterday, in his open-neck shirt, smiling the carefree smile of a man who is above the clamour.

And yet, you couldn't help wondering.

Fianna Fáil have learned a thing or two from their developer friends. For sure, build it and they will come. Better again, target a suitable property, demolish, rebuild and reap the profit.

Nearly a week of painstaking tinkering with the Greens. Then everything collapses.

Nothing to do with us, pleaded Fianna Fáil last night. It's not like the Greens are a listed building or anything.

Although naturally, the party is very saddened at the turn of events. They say the situation is not beyond repair, and will seek to rebuild if possible.

Séamus Brennan is always rolled out to deal with these sensitive situations. In the manner of a property speculator who discovers that the protected structure he purchased on prime building land has inexplicably burned to the ground during the night, Séamus Brennan said he was "somewhat surprised" when negotiations with the Greens collapsed.

"We are still available to see if there are still gaps to be bridged," he said, oozing good faith. "We are available to try to continue to close those gaps," continued Mr Sincerity.

There was "common ground" between the two parties. They had built up a "fine relationship" during their talks on forming a government. The atmosphere was "great" and the "goodwill" was bouncing off the walls.

However, he said sadly, there were five main sticking points. (He had them written down on a little slip of paper in his hand.) Climate change, transport, education, local government, health. And that was even before any talk of divvying up jobs or considering the PDs.

Between now and Thursday, even President McAleese, Ireland's answer to Isambard Kingdom Brunel, would have difficulty crafting a structure to span those particular gaps.

In the course of regretting the disintegration of negotiations, Séamus surveyed the wreckage and expressed the heartfelt view that there is still hope. They could knuckle down in the coming days and restore the Fianna Fáil/Green edifice to a workable majority.

However, in the middle of his discourse on the desirability of restoration, he threw out three significant words: "enormous financial implications". It sounded like that chilling mantra of the experienced builder, who knows he has a more suitable set of plans in his back pocket.

"Well, we could do it, but it'll cost ya." And so to the exhausted Greens, like starry-eyed newlyweds who bought a ramshackle old outhouse with the intention of turning it into a rose-clad cottage, now facing the harsh reality of impossible renovation costs.

Their wish list was long, and very expensive. They were dealing with Fianna Fáil - marvellous contractors, but an old-school, top-end outfit.

"We got to like them," said John Gormley. "And Brian Cowen said he got to like us." But countless cups of tea, scratching of heads and calculations done with stubby pencils later, Fianna Fáil weren't willing to cut their margins enough to deliver their ambitious designs.

Things were "very cordial", said Green leader Trevor Sargent. Their brief working relationship "concluded on a very friendly basis", added Deputy Gormley.

You could see the Greens were gutted. Their grand project, at least with Fianna Fáil, proved unsustainable.

However, the party stressed they are still available to discuss their plans with willing contractors. The conservation of their blueprint for government is all-important to the Greens.

But they are up against the greatest conservationist of them all - Bertie Ahern. All along, his stated aim has been to construct and conserve a Fianna Fáil, Bertie Ahern-led administration.

The building bricks lie waiting, among the ranks of the silent.