The week that was at a glance
What Rotters
Canadians are trying to tarnish their "nice" image by voting for the "worst Canadian" in their history. Top of the list is Irishman Patrick James Whelan, an immigrant who assassinated D'Arcy McGee, father of confederation. The online poll is being run by The Beaver, a Canadian history magazine. Deborah Morrison, history society president and CEO, said that "everyone knows the best stories often come from the seamier sides of our history".
Hot Bottoms
The Japanese are being warned to avoid exploding bidets. The government has launched an investigation and Toto, Japan's biggest toilet manufacturer, offered to repair 180,000 bidets last month after more than 100 emitted flames due to faulty wiring. The bidets feature a pulsating massage spray, built-in deodoriser and an automatic lid. No injuries have been reported.
Quote. . .
The trouble is, the BBC is now run by women and it shows soap operas, cooking, quizzes and kitchen-sink plays. Sir Patrick Moore on why TV standards have declined in recent years.
We now know. . .
Obsessed soccer fansfantasise about footie 80 times a day. Sheffield United supporters are most passionate, with the average fan thinking about their team 110 times a day. Everton fans dream about their team 43 times a day.
A remote-controlled, vibrating sex toyhas been banned from Cyprus as a military threat. Ann Summers, maker of The Love Bug 2, says that the device is capable of scrambling military frequencies, though it is available everywhere else in Europe.
The Numbers . . .
2Budgies found in Portlaoise prison where tuck shop sold bird seed.
2Pairs of knickers Paris Hilton was allowed to pack for 45-day stay in prison - two more than usual
2.5mAircraft take-offs scheduled for May - an all-time record.