Mourners at the joint funeral of Jim and Marie Quigley were told that Mr Quigley had battled his mental illness but it was “one battle we could not win.”
At the requiem mass in Dundalk on Saturday, their son-in-law Jeff Ahern, said that they had been “‘a wonderful couple and wonderful parents who loved each other dearly,2 and that they had, “stood by each other through thick and thin.” More than a thousand mourners gathered for the mass at St Joseph’s Redemptorist Church to pay their respects to the couple who died within hours of each other last Monday.
Mrs Quigley,nee Beagan, (69) was found murdered at the family home in Kilkerley, near Hackballscross while Mr Quigley (69) died after his car went into the path of an oncoming lorry on the wrong side of the M1 motorway. Gardaí say they are investigating “all aspects” surrounding their deaths but are treating it as a murder suicide.
At the start of the mass a number of items were brought up to the altar which symbolised different aspects of their lives. They included a family photograph which the congregation was told was an image of happy times and precious memories "that we cling to at times like these." There was an Irish country music CD that represented the love the couple had for such music, there was a copy of The Racing Post as Jim loved "a quick flutter, a dare, a chance to win," and there was a piece of pottery to represent Marie's creativity and a signed copy of former US President Bill Clinton's autobiography My Life.
There was a Scania hat to represent the Quigley family business and a clock that reflected the generations of “Beagan’s Customs Clearance,” a business that Marie had been a co-director of. Mourners were told that the mass was a celebration of all that was “good and wholesome2 in their lives. The main celebrant, Fr Tommy Hogan, a family friend who is currently chaplain at Our Lady of Lourdes Hospital in Drogheda said, that he has never experienced such unconditional love as that expressed by the family towards Jim.
He said Mr Quigley had a cross in life that Jim had described to him as being like “a big dark cloud.” In a conversation a number of years ago Mr Quigley told the priest that when he come out of the dark cloud, “it was like after being drunk; you remember little bits and people tell you (more) and you remember them.”
Mr Quigley had told Fr Hogan that he knew he hurt his family when he was under that cloud, “but do you know something they always forgave me.”
Fr Hogan said that in his time in the priesthood he has never come across “an expression of unconditional love of God that I found in this family,” in the way they had always forgiven him. The congregation heard how this time is, for their immediate family, “suspended and unreal, filled with raw emotions and muddled thoughts.”
Marie was described in the prayers of the faithful as a woman “of deep faith, a wonderful mother, faithful wife and friend. Her life was filled with kindness and goodness as well as outreach to those in need.”
A special reflection after Holy Communion was read by Marie’s sister Noreen Beagan. Then the couple’s son-in-law Jeff Ahern spoke and described how they had supported each other throughout their marriage.
He said Marie was very successful in business, “but she couldn’t have been successful without the love and support of Jim.”
He said Jim had “reared his children by day before going out to work by night,” and he had been a family man. They were described as a “wonderful couple,” who loved each other dearly and “stood by each other thorough thick and thin”. Mr Ahern said: “Jim’s illness, which he battled for a number of years, deteriorated from a physical illness to a mental illness. Having, as a family, gone through everything together, this was one battle we just couldn’t win.”
The couple were buried together beside their son Aidan, who died at a young age, in St Patrick’s Cemetery, Dundalk.