If Michael Noonan is not successful this time he could always consider a career change and set up a mobile sweet shop. His campaign bus is surprisingly well stocked with jars of bon-bons, cola cubes and, the confectionery all the passengers were giving their No 1 to yesterday, chocolate éclairs.
On a tour of west Dublin shopping centres, the Alternative Taoiseach was showing no signs of being licked in this early stage of the contest, unlike the lollipops of every flavour he also has on the bus.
Accompanied by the Dublin West FG candidate, Sheila Terry, he walked through the crowds in the Blanchardstown Centre sweet-talking everyone from old women to younger shoppers. "There are a lot of non-voters here," he confided as yet another belly-top-wearing, pierced-nose teenager strolled past. "Hello, ladies," he said in treacle tones. "Can I say hello to you?".
The Limerick patter didn't go down with everyone. "I hate his voice," complained one woman listening to the FG leader as he travelled upwards on the escalator. "His people should do something about it. I really can't stand it".
The walkabouts were low-key, in contrast to the buzz that surrounds Bertie Ahern and, canvassing with Dublin South West candidate, Brian Hayes, at The Square in Tallaght, the popularity of his main opponent was difficult to escape.
Noonan declared he was itching for a debate with Ahern who, he said, was running a campaign based on posters, not issues. "I offered to meet him on TG4, but he didn't seem to take that seriously," he smiled.
Shaking Noonan's hand, an impressed-looking young boy asked: "Do you know Bertie?" "Yes," grimaced Noonan. "But I also know Brian Hayes". Later another troublesome future voter cheekily shouted: "Vote Sinn Féin". "Sssh, didn't your mother teach you not to use bad language?" retorted Noonan quick as a flash.
But like the rest of the nation's politicians, the party leader with the lollipop stash spent most of the day sucking up to hundreds of strangers. Some of these fared better than others, one lucky communion girl even receiving a five euro note for her trouble. It was, Mr Noonan informed us, bad luck not to line the pockets of a new communicant but Noonan wasn't carrying any cash. Luckily one of his advisors did the honours. "At least it wasn't in a brown envelope," said the bemused father as Sugar Daddy Noonan strode happily away.