This Week They Said

We cannot spend what we have not got. - Taoiseach Bertie Ahern.

We cannot spend what we have not got. - Taoiseach Bertie Ahern.

Bus lanes have been suspended due to weather conditions. In effect this means that it is a free-for-all. Go for it.

- A Garda statement after torrential rain causes severe flooding throughout Dublin.

I was sent off for pushing him. If you are going to get sent off, you might as well punch him properly.

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- Footballer Roy Keane on his dismissal after a fracas with Alan Shearer last year.

I am going because they are fellow Irish citizens and they are entitled to basic human rights.

- Fianna Fáil's Senator Mary White on her decision to attend the trial in Bogota of the "Colombia three".

I won't stay in France even if they grant me asylum.

- An Iraqi refugee after a four-day occupation of a chapel in the Channel port of Calais.

Why should fear, killing, destruction, displacement, orphaning and widowing continue to be our lot, while security, stability and happiness be your lot?

- A statement attributed to al-Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden.

We'll send in the army to commandeer fire engines.

- British Prime Minister Tony Blair's blunt message to striking fire fighters.

I have real misgivings about the compatibility of masonry and Christian profession.

- Archbishop of Canterbury elect Dr Rowan Williams.

A democracy without values is converted easily into open or covert totalitarianism.

- Pope John Paul II.

I am a visionary.

- Pop star Michael Jackson.

The fact of the matter was that RTÉ had been blamed by Fianna Fáil for causing the very unsatisfactory 1989 general election result.

- Former adviser to the Taoiseach Dr Martin Mansergh.

We are very concerned about the privacy issue, and that is why we have banned the phones from the gym.

- Gym owner Pat Henry prohibits camera phones on his Dublin premises.

The similarities are obvious, from the arched barrel vault running the length of the room to the double-height book stacks.

- Website Irish-architecture.com on parallels between Trinity College's Long Library and the Jedi archives featured in the Star Wars movie Attack of the Clones.

If you want to go all the way and become a Muslim radical and are ready to get circumcised, I invite you to Moscow. We are a multi-confessional country, we have experts in this field, too. I will recommend that they carry out the operation in such a way that nothing grows back.

- Russian president Vladimir Putin.

He is also a paradox - on the one hand the ultimate professional and on the other likely to respond and react in the most unpredictable way.

- The FAI-Genesis report's assessment of Roy Keane.

My parents will call me every Wednesday night and say, "Great show, tell them to talk slower".

- Aaron Sorkin, creator of television drama The West Wing. Actors on the show are encouraged to speak more quickly to make them appear clever.

We ought to tell every other Muslim living in this nation that if you say one word, you're gone.

- Veteran US television evangelist Jimmy Swaggart.

They were making progress on O'Connell Street. I went down there recently and didn't have to duck any spears. I was only assaulted three times and that is a huge improvement.

- U2 singer Bono.

I get all these bibles sent to me saying , "repent now", and I shred them.

- Singer Elton John.