Dubliners may be getting into a flap about the impending opening of a sex shop in their main street, but it would take more than a few fancy knickers to faze the cool southeast. If the Wexford People has it right, Wexford will see its first sex shop open this week.
"Final touches were being put to the shop on Tuesday with shelves being stocked with sex aids of every size, shape and description," we are told. And despite its imminent opening, there appears to be "little controversy on Main Street".
However, Alderman Padge Reck will be raising the issue with the Town Clerk. "We could do without it, but I don't think there is a by-law preventing it," he said. Meanwhile, the Westmeath Examiner has news from Drumcree. Drumcree, Co Westmeath, that is, where the spokesman for the Orange Order, David Jones, made an unannounced visit last week.
Resplendent in Orange sash, his presence was linked to the publication of a book of photographs by Co Down-based photographer, Bobby Hanevy. Drumcree, Co Westmeath, was chosen as a "superb opportunistic shot" for Mr Hanevy.
Catherine O'Farrell, who manages the Village Stores, said a man approached her and asked if she had ever met an Orangeman. "When I told him I didn't know, he introduced himself as David Jones and said `You have now'."
One resident refused to shake hands with Mr Jones, and the jottings of some journalists raised further ire. Of especial annoyance was their translation of the town's Irish name, Druim Criadh, to "the hill of mud".
Also with a Northern flavour, the Western People tells us that Mayo County Council has given cross-party support to a resolution to "decommission" mobile phones. The move came after a "rash of mobile phone calls" during a meeting of the council a fortnight ago.
The paper also had proof of the medicinal qualities of drink. Ballaghaderreen Court was told that local man Alan Greene had been found in possession of four bottles of poitin, which he said he had bought for his grandfather.
Defending him, Declan O'Callaghan said his client's grandfather "had an ailment and swore by this particular liquor". His client was doing what he believed was his good deed.
"He was going to get a good cure," quipped Judge Connellan, before applying the Probation Act and advising the defendant to get the doctor next time. It was cheaper and safer, he said.
Also on alcohol, the Offaly Express welcomes the proposed extra hour of drinking time allowed in the Minister for Justice's Bill on pub-opening times. "The Minister has gone some way in acknowledging the reality of the situation," it says. The reality, it explains, is that "Irish drinking habits have changed".
The Irish pub nowadays, "instead of being the butt of international ridicule, has become the model as an ideal social setting for an enjoyable evening out in practically every country in the world."
Indeed, in some spots, so sophisticated and so trustworthy have we become about alcohol that pubs are self-service. The Tuam Herald reports the evidence heard by Judge Desmond Hogan against a Dunmore pub charged with a breach of the licensing laws.
Gardai told of entering the pub at 1.30 a.m., finding a number of people drinking there, including one who had served himself a can of beer. Told by the defending solicitor, Joan O'Brien, that the premises had just been refurbished and was well run, Judge Hogan said he was curious to know how, if it was so well run, some one could just walk off the street and serve themselves.
"Joan O'Brien said she had no instruction on this aspect of the case," the paper reports.
In Donegal a row over a Traveller halting site - or lack of it - goes on. The Donegal Democrat reported the occupation of the Market Yard in Ballyshannon by members of the Travelling community and claims that they were causing a health hazard.
Human faeces had been found in the yard, and the paper quotes an environmental health report. It says that "although it would be difficult to ascertain exactly where the faeces originated, it was presumed the Travellers were to blame."
Finally, those Healy-Rae boys are at it again. As the Kerryman tells it, Independent Councillor Michael Connor-Scarteen rounded on Jackie and his son Michael at the first meeting of Kerry County Council.
Following their decision to back Fianna Fail's Ted Fitzgerald for the chairmanship, he said they had been full of praise for him [Connor-Scarteen] during the election and "today they had the opportunity to do something about that . . . They're more Fianna Fail than some of the Fianna Fail members," he said.
They also got the back-up of Independent Councillor Brendan Cronin for failing to back his bid for a seat on the Southern Health Board. The father and son double-act voted with Fianna Fail on every issue at the meeting.
Referring to Jackie Healy-Rae's agenda, Cllr Cronin commented: "A lot of people are worried about this famous shopping list. Well, it's simple. It's myself, myself and my son. It's disgraceful."
