Like many a bride, Karen Kent was in the hairdressers hours before her big date at the church. But it was a solo show for her as she took her final vows as a nun, writes Olivia Kelleher
Irish Catholics of a certain vintage have preconceived notions of nuns. Anyone over 30 thinks of the nuns of their childhood - women who, though they may have been relatively young, were always "old" and who dedicated their lives to trying to educate girls who were more interested in boys and the Bay City Rollers.
Sr Karen Kent (42), the first woman to enter the Ursuline order in Ireland for 14 years, blows all the stereotypes of what a nun should be out of the water. My first contact with her was three hours before she took her final vows at a ceremony in Cork city last Saturday.
I called her mobile and she politely informed me that she was getting her hair cut and asked if she could call me back. She chuckled lateras she recounted telling the hairdresser about what her plans were for the day.
"She [ the hairdresser] had the scissors at one side of my head and I was talking on the phone to you on the other. Then you have to explain to the person cutting your hair what is happening. It was a girl who had never cut my hair before and she didn't know me. And you know there were people from weddings coming in which would be normal and here I am in the midst of all these brides getting my hair done for my final profession."
Sr Karen, the eldest daughter of a Wexford-born mother and a British father, grew up in Stoke-on-Trent. She first came in contact with the Ursulines though her Aunt Phyllis, who is a member of the order in Co Waterford.
Sr Karen's father Frank came from a Church of Ireland background and her mother was a traditional Irish Catholic. She says it was the norm in her house to see her parents go to two different churches to worship. She was surrounded by different faiths and absorbed and respected them all.
SHE HAS FOND memories of her trips to Waterford to see her Aunt Phyllis in the Ursuline order and being invited over for formal afternoon tea.
"It would all be served with teapots and the best china out and the bells would ring and the nuns would appear. It felt as if there were 10 doors and they all descended to meet the family. And when you had your tea you might go to evening prayer. Convents have changed hugely since. Now you go in and you go to the kitchen and make a cup of coffee and sit down in the dining room."
As a young woman Sr Karen was fascinated by the story of Angela Merici, the Italian woman who founded the Ursuline order in 1535. At that time in Italy women had two "choices" - get married or enter an enclosed order.
In beginning her order, Merici never formally conceived of women becoming "nuns" in the traditional sense. Rather, she wanted her company to live in the world, as models of Christian living. Religious life for women took on a new dimension; these young women would live at home, or at their place of work if they were in service, or in twos or threes in small houses.
As the Ursulines expanded and grew the order split and the traditional convent became more widespread. However, Sr Karen says Merici was a radical woman for her time as she wanted nuns to be "agents of change" and worked in an innovative way to make that a reality.
Sr Karen starting working in youth ministry in the diocese of Birmingham in the UK while in her early 20s. She thoroughly enjoyed her job but says the whole idea of becoming a nun was always "niggling away" at the back of her mind. As part of her youth ministry she took part in a vocations promotion weekend and a chance conversation with a nun called Sr Anne Conway changed her life forever.
"This whole thing about religious life came up in the context of the conversation and she said, 'You know, Karen, you will never, ever know unless you give it a try'. She said sometimes you just have to take the risk."
KAREN JOINED THE Irish Ursulines in 1997. Since then she has studied theology in NUI Maynooth to Masters level. She worked in a classroom setting for a year but admits her new job as co-ordinator of parish pastoral development in Cork is better suited to her personality.
Sr Karen is responsible for reaching out to the laity in no fewer than 34 parishes in Cork, from the city out to Rosscarbery in west Cork. Her job entails long hours - she often heads out in the morning to meet clergy members, returns home in the evening for a bite to eat and Mass and heads down to the likes of Kilmichael in west Cork for a second series of meetings in the evening.
However, for all the long hours involved, Sr Karen is passionate about the importance of making lay people more than "fathers' helpers".
"My job involves working with the laity to help them see how they can be involved and to be influential and decision-makers. My role is not to take away the role of the priest but for people to see they can be proactive and part of the parish. You might go to three or four parishes in a week. If you go for one meeting you go away with two more in the diary. You always have to go back.
2My research in Maynooth involved the whole role of the laity so I really enjoy this."
Sr Karen says the day she professed her final vows was one of the most joyful moments of her life. Her mother Mary and brother Kevin came over to Cork for the ceremony and nuns from all of the Ursuline communities in Cork congregated for the Mass at St Michael's church in Blackrock. Her father Frank was too ill to travel but she plans to return to Stoke-on-Trent later this year for a big celebration there.
Karen says she was deeply moved when she finally took her vows in the presence of her congregational leader Sr Kitty Kelly, the Bishop of Cork and Ross, Dr John Buckley, and her parish priest in Stoke-on-Trent, Fr Eddie Butler.
HOWEVER, SHE ADMITS to feeling a little self-conscious during a ceremony which lasted one hour and 45 minutes - longer than a wedding. Mild embarrassment aside, she says she is embarking on a new and exciting period in her life and is extremely happy.
"When there is a bride and groom there are two of you. It was just me. And that was the time you think 'I am on my own now'. You sit on this chair in the middle of the aisle of the church and all eyes are on you. It seemed to last forever. I know it didn't but that is how it feels when you are the only one standing up there. It was wonderful when I got to the end of the Mass and was officially welcomed into the order. It was the end of years of work.
"I don't know what the future has in store. Nobody knows where they might be in few years' time. It is trusting that whatever happens God's plan is there somewhere. I am very happy."