It was, of course, entirely natural for the Shinners to celebrate recently the 20th anniversary of the mass escape from HMP The Maze in 1983. Only one prison officer died following the break-out, which is a small enough tithe considering what else they'd got up to in their time.
And naturally, the peace process being the piece-by-piece process, hotel security at the commemorative party in Donegal was surrendered by the State to para-shinners in black.
Older German guests staying in the hotel might possibly have felt a certain terrified frisson at the sight of black-clad goons doing the work that the police should have been doing.
So one anniversary went by; but of course, there are many others which Sinn Féin-IRA will want to celebrate over the coming months. In a couple of weeks, for example, there's the 10th anniversary of the Frissell's chip-shop massacre, which they might very well wish to mark with the sort of cheery self-congratulatory burlesque with which they commemorated the Maze escape.
In order to spare the Shinner balladeers any trouble, we have composed an all-purpose anthem, to be sung whenever Shinners gather to recollect their heroic past.
Derek Warfield, that brainless zone that is the heart and soul of the Continuity Wolfe Tones, will he happy to hear that neither The Irish Times nor An Irishman's Diary will charge royalties on the lyrics - if, that is, I may be permitted to mention such an unrepublican word in his hearing.
To the tune of the Campdown Races, though a little light on the doo-dahs, all together now:
1. Who deep fried the Shankill
Prods?
We did. We did.
Bits of plaice with kid
and cod,
Up the IRA.
Who put the bombs in
Birmingham?
We did. We Did.
Twenty folk sliced up
like ham,
Up the IRA.
Chorus: Remember
Mullaghmore,
Dead children in the bay.
Beside them bob the OAPs,
Up the IRA.
2. Who made off with
the widow Jean?
We did. We did.
A silent grave that's
never seen,
Up the IRA.
Who stiffed the Prods at
Kingsmill Cross?
We did. We did.
Ten bluenoses
are no loss,
Up the IRA.
Chorus: Let's
recall La Mon,
Dog-lovers burn
like hay.
A dozen Prods are
barbecued,
Up the IRA.
3.Who put a bomb
in a hospital?
We did. We did.
Made ill Brits feel
iller still,
Up the IRA.
Who blew up
Remembrance
Day?
We did. We did.
Eleven lackeys
blown away,
Up the IRA.
Chorus: Who'll
condemn our
deeds?
For history's
shown the way.
We kept our guns
in government,
Up the IRA.
4. Who knifed
Eamon Collins,
then?
We did. We did.
The sort of thing
we'll do again,
Up the IRA.
Who took the files
from Castlereagh?
We did, we did.
Who helped FARC in our
special way?
Up the IRA.
Chorus: Just one question
mark,
What will Steak-knife say?
Were all our leaders touts
throughout?
Oh f**k the IRA.