Andy Barclay of Howth and of this newspaper sent a fine selection of stories from his wide reading. In the Diary of a Country Parson, by James Woodforde (17401803), first published in 1924, there is much about good living and rare customs. Here are two odd pigs and the spelling is as in his diary. "1778 April 15... Brewed a vessel of strong Beer today. My two large Piggs, by drinking some Beer grounds taking out of my Barrels today, got so amazingly drunk, that they were not able to stand and appeared like dead things almost... I never saw Piggs so drunk in my life... April 16. My 2 Piggs are still unable to walk yet, but they are better than they were yesterday. They tumble about the yard and can by no means stand steady yet. In the afternoon my 2 Piggs were tolerably sober. March 23. Memorandum. In shaving my face this morning I happened to cut one of my moles which bled much, and happening also to kill a small moth that was flying about, I applied it to my mole and it instantaneously stopped the bleeding"
His medical treatments are not to be recommended. Here is an attempt to be rid of a stye in the eye. Again, his own spelling: "March 11, 1791. Mem. The Stiony on my right Eye-lid still swelled and inflamed very much. As it is commonly said that the Eye-lid being rubbed by the tail of a black Cat would do it much good if not entirely cure it, and very soon after dinner I found my Eye-lid much abated of the swelling and almost free from Pain. I cannot therefore but conclude it to be of the greatest service to a Stiony on the Eye-lid. Any other Cat's Tail may have the above effect in all probability - but I did my Eye-lid with my own black Tom Cat's Tail. He was to be disappointed; then sent on to a "plaister", then warm milk and water, finally cold water, which appeared to help.
There was not much sentimentality about dogs in the parson's world. April 11. Friday (1794): One of my Greyhounds, young Fly, got to Betty Cary's this morning and ran away with a Shoulder of Mutton undressed & eat it all up. They made great lamentation & work about it. I had the Greyhound hanged in the Evening." On another date this cryptic note: "Had a couple of Tubbs of Gin brought me this evening ... soon safely lodged." Andy is reminded of Kipling's Smugglers Song: "Brandy for the Parson, Baccy for the Clerk."
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