Rite and Reason: Changing the formula of words has brought a lot of people back to Confession, writes Fr John O'Connell.
Over the years, when speaking to parents of children preparing for First Communion, I have been surprised to discover that their experience of First Confession has been pretty much the same as my own: a dark box, fear, not a happy memory. This is still the case for parents even though they are all less than half my age.
When I came to Bray in 1974 hearing confessions accounted for much of my work as a priest. Every Saturday we were kept busy in the confession box - two hours in the morning, one hour in the afternoon and two hours again at night.
I had many positive experiences. After all, confession is good for the soul. However, after some time I came to realise that for many people going to Confession was anything but a joyful experience, instead there were feelings of anxiety, guilt, scruples and fear.
At that time, talking to parents of First Communion children, I heard funny stories (making up sins, swapping sins, confessing to a deaf priest and so on) and horror stories (priests who frightened the life out of children because they forgot the words of the Act of Contrition).
So, in 1980 at Christmas, the priests in Holy Redeemer made the following announcement: "Any person who finds Confession a severe ordeal and comes to Confession in this church need only say 'I am sorry for my sins and I want forgiveness'."
All the priests had been consulted and would give absolution on the basis of that formula. After all, in the story of the prodigal son, the father was satisfied with the simple statement: "Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you, I no longer deserve to be called your son."
The response was amazing. People came out of the woodwork to avail of what one person described as "that special Christmas offer".
Shortly after that we introduced the communal celebration of the Sacrament of Reconciliation, or Rite Two, and have been celebrating it on a regular basis ever since.
It is availed of by very large numbers of people, especially at Christmas and Easter. Indeed at midday next Saturday you will most likely find Holy Redeemer full to capacity with upwards of 500 people present to take part in Rite Two.
It is also according to this Rite Two that children celebrate their First Confession: no more dark boxes, so, we hope, no more fear.
There are three questions people often ask about the Sacrament of Reconciliation:
What do I say when I am making my individual Confession?
Why do I have to tell my sins to a priest?
What are the real sins today?
Let's look at them.
What do I say to the priest? There is no need for any great detail. The Lord knows us through and through and has already forgiven us. Maybe something like "I want forgiveness, especially for my selfishness" or whatever, would suffice.
Why do we need a priest? Inspired by the gospel story of the woman with the issue of blood who touched the hem of Jesus's garment, was healed and then received the affirmation "your faith has saved you", I tell the story of my four-year-old nephew.
He had a big row with his mother and was banished to his room until he learned to behave himself. After about an hour, the door opened and a little man with a very sullen face appeared. As soon as he opened that door Pat was reconciled with his mother. When she saw him, she took him in her arms and gave him a great hug. Pat started to smile from ear to ear. Reconciliation was complete. The link is obvious. As soon as we enter the church to celebrate the Sacrament of Reconciliation we have touched the hem of the Lord's garment. The absolution from the priest is the divine hug, the completion of the process.
What are the real sins today? Most of the pain and hurt in the world are caused by people close to one another: hurtful words, coldness, angry outbursts, lying and unfaithfulness. We are all aware of man's inhumanity to man. Nowadays we have a greater awareness of social sin - the starving millions, refugees, the homeless, etc. We are not the cause of their misery but they are our brothers and sisters and we are part of the world which allows this to exist, and we have some responsibility for putting it right.
Fr John O'Connell is parish priest at Holy Redeemer, Bray, Co Wicklow