Sir, - I should very much like to compete in RTE's quiz show, Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. However, I am slightly perturbed that I may inadvertently give the right answer to a question, and so count myself out of a lot of lolly.
This is a very real risk, as Tyrone Productions know more about, for example, hearts, than Maurice Neligan himself.
In order to test the water, therefore, I would like to run a few questions of my own past the Tyrone Productions team, so as to establish credentials:
(1) Is Pluto a planet, or a Disney dog?
(2) Where would I find genuine truffles - in a French oak forest, or in the possession of the Milk Tray Man?
(3) Is a penguin an aquatic flightless bird, or a chocolate bar?
(4) Is Uranus another heavenly body, or from whence you speak? - Yours, etc.,
D.K. Henderson, Castle Avenue, Clontarf, Dublin 3..