Sir, - We agree with Helen Gilmartin of the Adoptive Parents Association of Ireland (February 5th) that young people should be educated in "all the facts of life".
Here are some other facts of life. Under current adoption procedure, a natural mother often does not receive the promised photograph or minimal information about the child she has given up for adoption. Perhaps she may be lucky enough to have a diligent social worker who will battle on her behalf for this modest "gift" - her only proof that her child is alive and hopefully happy. However, if the adoptive parents maintain a refusal to give this, there is nothing, legally, that can be done.
Adoption agencies have arbitrary notions of the age of adulthood, and some refuse to start a search on behalf of a natural mother until her "child" is as old as 23 or 26. Until then, agency social workers cannot deal directly with the adopted person, and must speak only to his/her adoptive parents - who often do not tell the adopted child about her natural mother's wish to make contact. In some cases, unfortunately, adoptive parents give false or negative information about their natural parentage to their young adopted children and this influences current and future reunions.
Furthermore (although admittedly rarely) some have never told their children they were adopted and they cannot be legally compelled to do so. This leads to a very difficult task for social workers who have to reveal the truth of their origins to adult adopted people whose natural parents wish to make contact with them.
We must emphasise here that all of the foregoing is happening in Ireland today, not in the mists of the past. This is the reality of adoption under Irish law.
Is it any wonder, therefore, that only 100 babies were given up for adoption in Ireland last year? Certainly we would not recommend any girl or woman to part with her child under the present harsh regime.
We call on organisations representing adoptive parents to join with us in asking for the necessary legislation to protect the interests and rights of our children. Surely that is what we all want? - Yours, etc., Bernie Harold,
Chairperson, Natural Parents Network of Ireland, PO Box 6714, Dublin 4.