Joyce Hanna’s beloved father John died last year. “He was 100 and a half,” she says.
A wonderful man with a terrific spirit, he had lived by himself for almost a decade, since the loss of his beloved wife Peggy in 2013.
The couple raised their family in Malahide and Joyce, who lives in Bray, well remembers the many years she spent juggling childcare and eldercare, initially for her mother.
“When my daughter was very young, I’d drop her to primary school in Bray in the morning before driving over to Malahide to help get Mum up and ready for the day and be back just in time to collect my daughter from school at half twelve,” she says.
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Initially John, a doctor, was her mother’s primary carer but as Peggy declined and needed more care, she moved into a nursing home, in 2009. “Had ALHomecare been around then, I’d have used them,” says Joyce now.
John became a widower at 91. Though Joyce visited often and called every day, she could see that over time it was becoming harder for her father to live alone.
“He didn’t need help at that stage, but he was lonely. He often said that if he didn’t have his dog, Soldier, he wouldn’t hear his own voice at all,” she says.
He often said that if he didn’t have his dog, Soldier, he wouldn’t hear his own voice at all,” she says.
This time, a nursing home was not the solution. “I decided to look into the idea of getting him an au pair, though I didn’t tell him that’s what she was. Instead, I said ‘Dad, how would you feel about letting a language student stay and in return she’ll cook you dinner?’,” she says.
“He was up for it. He didn’t need care at that stage, he just needed company. It worked great and it gave me peace of mind,” she says.
Indeed, it worked so well that when the au pair had to return to France other au pairs followed. They included Johanna from Venezuela, whom John taught to drive. He made Joyce laugh with a picture he texted of the two of them in the car sporting sunglasses “which he never wore”, with the message “Off to rob a bank, book a holiday!”.
“They just had so much fun together. I’m only just back from visiting Johanna in Madrid, where she now lives,” says Joyce.
She stayed five years and other au pairs followed but by 2019 Joyce could see a decline in her father. “He was just slowing down. It was clear he was mixing up his medications and he needed additional support,” says Joyce.
She researched visiting home help agencies, but they didn’t suit. “There was no guarantee that the same woman would come in and, with different people coming in, he wouldn’t be the main man anymore, they’d be telling him what to do, which wouldn’t do at all,” she adds.
Then she found ALHomecare, which stands for Affordable Live-in Homecare, online. It seemed to offer the perfect solution, including a three-week trial to ensure John and his carer were compatible.
“The whole thing, from beginning to end, was a win win. It was affordable, it was good value, and the beauty of it was that if he had gone into a nursing home, he wouldn’t have been able to bring his beloved dog Soldier,” she says.
Through ALHomecare she found a woman in her 60s from Poland, Danuta. “As soon as Dad met her, he said “she’s the one”. They hit it off instantly and she did everything right. We called her Angel Danuta, because she was like someone who had dropped from the sky for us. She looked after Dad like I would, maybe even better,” says Joyce.
“We’d all go over for a family dinner twice a week, with my father and Danuta. She was a brilliant cook. She would take Dad out for a drive every day. They’d go for coffee and cake, or shopping for Georgian wines, which they became expert in. Once I got a text from him telling me; “We’re up in Newry eating ice creams”. He loved telling me the stories of what they got up to, parking in the lady captain’s spot at the golf club while Danuta picked up coffee and cake. Even at 100 he loved going against the system,” she laughs.
Having Danuta there also meant that for her own visits, Joyce could sit and talk with her father, as Danuta had everything else under control.
The year passed happily but unfortunately her father caught pneumonia and Covid. By the time he had recovered in hospital well enough to come home, he had lost his mobility. “Danuta organised the hospital bed for him. We put it in the sitting room, where he could look out over the garden,” she says.
As her father’s health continued to decline and it became clear he was dying, Danuta brought her own mattress into the sitting room floor beside him, the better to care for him. John died surrounded by family, and Danuta.
For Joyce her sad loss is softened by knowing that her father was so well looked after and died peacefully at home.
“ALHomecare was really transformational for us as a family. Our father was happy and secure. Danuta gave more than 100 per cent to my father and we so appreciated her,” she says.
“Before I found it, I didn’t know this agency from Adam. But I recommend it now. My father had the perfect end, after the perfect final year, and I can never thank them enough.”
To find out more about ALHomecare’s affordable live-in homecare service and avail of their 3 week trial period, visit www.alhomecare.ie or phone their inquiry lines: 087 991 6791 or 087 744 0729.
ALHomecare provides a nationwide service.