The Benhaffaf twins' family holiday of a lifetime

After an exhausting and stressful summer which saw both of my little twins undergo surgery, we were all desperate for a much-needed break.

Hassan underwent complex spinal surgery at the end of May and had barely recovered when his brother Hussein got ill suddenly in the middle of the night in late June.

Some of the repair work following his separation had come undone and his intestine was pushing through the tear causing him severe pain. It was extremely frightening at the time, and unexpected.

We presented at Cork University Hospital, but had to transfer to Crumlin. After a week sitting at his bedside, it was decided that only Dr Edward Kiely, who had separated the twins, could help Hussein, so it was back to Great Ormond Street Hospital in London for the whole family. Hussein underwent his surgery and was left with a new eight inch scar across his little body. It was heart wrenching to see him go through so much pain again.

I could see the fear on my other children's faces the night he was rushed to hospital by ambulance, it was clear that this was how life was going to be for them, which deeply saddened me.

Relentless struggles
As the summer drew to a close my eldest daughter Malika reminded me that we had spent the entire school holidays in hospitals. I felt particularly sad for the girls as they hadn't had a proper holiday in years.

Each day they are faced with the continuous struggles their little brothers go through. The level of care required for the boys and the fact that they just have one leg each means hours of physiotherapy every day at home as well as practising to walk wearing their prosthetic limbs or "Superman legs" as the boys call them! So with Hussein recovering well and the girls due to return to school we decided to take a few days' break in Kenmare.

We packed our Fiat Scudo to capacity. To an onlooker it would seem we were going on a month-long trip instead of a few days in Kenmare. But as any parent of a disabled or sick child will know there are a million things you have to bring. That's why it's impossible to take a holiday abroad: you could never fit all their necessities into a 20kg bag. We made our usual checklist to ensure we had all the boys' equipment and medical supplies, as well as their favourite Woody and Buzz toys and ride along cars.

We arrived at the Kenmare Bay Hotel, part of the Select Hotel Group, late Monday afternoon and were warmly greeted by Andrew Rees, the manager. We were shown to the two-bedroom lodge we'd opted to stay in, as it gave us so much more room for the boys. From experience I know that a double buggy never fits through hotel bedroom doors. The lodge was amazing, completely wheelchair accessible; wide doorways, a wet room with handrails and chair and a disabled parking space directly outside the lodge.

It had a gorgeous open-plan sitting room and kitchen with no tight corners to have to fit through. I found the entire hotel and leisure centre very easy to get around and the staff couldn’t have been more helpful. The boys were invited to join their sisters at the hotels Kids Club and even got to bake cookies and cupcakes.

Kenmare Bay Hotel had no problem adjusting menus to suit dietary needs and there was a wonderful camaraderie amongst the hotel staff and management.

On Tuesday we went on an hour-long cruise at Star Outdoors which was breathtaking and we were treated to a light lunch at Cons Restaurant overlooking the lakes. The restaurant was upstairs but I was impressed to see a wheelchair ramp which crept up the entire side of the building.

From the horse's mouth
We took a walk around Kenmare town and were warmly greeted by many well-wishers. The town had several large disabled car parking spaces. On Wednesday, we were invited down to the Dromquinna stables so the children could try horse riding through the woods and down to the sea. Hassan and Hussein had never been on a horse before and I wasn't sure if it would work as they have only half a pelvis each. Nevertheless, the lovely owners Michael and Xenia were eager to make this a wonderful experience for the children and another first for the boys.

The twins were given small horses called Ladybird and Hazelnut and they enthusiastically sat up on them awaiting the adventure ahead. It was emotional for us seeing the twins side-by-side on their horses cheekily grinning and looking so proud that they were able to do the same exciting activities as their big sisters.

Having just one leg can restrict them from doing some activities but they will try anything once. Later, we enjoyed a lovely picnic at Cush Strand. We basked in the peace and tranquillity and felt the stress of the traumatic summer just melt away. As the sun beamed down on the six of us, I thought there really is nowhere in the world as good as Ireland for a holiday especially when the sun is shining. It reminded me of why we had chosen Ireland for our honeymoon 14 years earlier.

A life more ordinary
On our third day, Malika and Iman begged me to buy a house in Kenmare as they wanted to live there forever. If only I had a magic wand!

The children loved the normality of just being kids and having fun, instead of the crammed hospital wards and physiotherapy appointments which have become such a routine in our lives. On Wednesday, the Kenmare Bay Hotel organised a wonderful afternoon at Art & Mór crafts. The kids loved the thrill of choosing a piece of pottery and carefully painting and decorating it to bring home. The twins each chose an aeroplane which they painted their favourite colours; blue for Hassan and green for Hussein. Malika painted a bowl for our little dog and Iman decorated a photo frame to hold a picture of our time together in Kenmare. It was a great afternoon and something we could enjoy as a family.

Kenmare was like a little slice of heaven and helped us to forget about our worries for the few days. The boys loved the ease of being able to get around the bungalow at the Kenmare Bay Hotel lodge and it did our hearts good to see the children smile again.

I would highly recommend the two bedroomed lodges for any family travelling with a disabled child or adult. It was like home away from home, except this home suited the boys much more than their own. It can be exhausting having children with disabilities; even when you’re on holidays you have to keep to the same routine of physio, medicines, personal care etc.

However, on this occasion I truly felt like we had some downtime too.

A big ‘well done’ to the Select Hotel Group for thinking of all of their guests’ needs. We will definitely return. It truly was one of the best breaks we have had together in a very long time. The photographs say it all.

This article will be published in Insight, a quarterly magazinbe devoted to changing perspectives on disability, which will appear with The Irish Times, this Wednesday September 25th.