This column found that our translation of the Tongan pre-match ritual was so popular that we decided to move on and offer our reader the opportunity to really impress his friends.

New Zealand are going to be in the Rugby World Cup for a considerable time to come so we thought that a translation of the Haka would be appropriate. The All Black Haka is the closing segment of an ancient Haka modified about 1810 by the great warrior chief Te Rauparaha of the Ngati Toa tribe.

He was being chased by the Nga Te Aho, whose relatives he had butchered and eaten . . . . as you did in those days. He hid in a pit for storing kumara (sweet potato) and waited for his pursuers to find him. He heard sounds above him and when the top of the pit opened thought he was done for when the sunlight flooded in.

He was slightly blinded but when his sight cleared he saw the hairy legs - there is a dirtier version than this - of the local chief, who hid him. When the danger was gone, Te Rauparaha jumped out and performed this version of the old Haka on the spot.

All together now, tongues out, eyeballs rolling.

Ka mate (It is death) Ka mate (It is death).

Ka ora (It is life) Ka ora (It is life).

Ka mate (It is death) Ka mate (It is death).

Ka ora (It is life) Ka ora (It is life).

Tenei te tangata pu-huru-huru (For this is the hairy man).

Nan nei I tiki Mai (Who fetched the sun).

Whaka-whiti te ra (And made it shine).

Hupane (Up the ladder) Kaupene (to the top).

Hupane (Up the ladder) Kaupane (to the top).

Whiti te ra (the sun shines).