George Kimball/American at Large in Athens: When Larry Brown began putting his cast of characters through dress rehearsals three weeks ago he pronounced the task at hand "the biggest challenge of my career".
Most assumed the peripatetic basketball coach was, as is sometimes his wont, crying wolf, but when the decidedly unfinished product was unveiled last Sunday night at the Helliniko Indoor Arena it became alarmingly clear, if anything, Brown had understated the case.
In what was, depending on one's allegiance, either the greatest upset in the history of professional basketball or the most humiliating loss ever by suffered by American hoopsters, the US men's basketball team was trounced by Puerto Rico 92-73 - and the result was most assuredly not a fluke. The Americans had expected to be booed in Greece. They just hadn't anticipated it would be by their own fans.
And while they bounced back with a 77-71 win over the host Greeks two nights later, it was apparent the NBA-crafted machine had blown a gasket which not even master craftsman Brown might be able to fix over the next 10 days.
When NBA players were first introduced to the Olympic mix a dozen years ago, the Michael Jordan/Larry Bird/Magic Johnson "Dream Team" defeated its Barcelona opponents by an average of 43.8 points a game. Until the Puerto Rican debacle the other night the US had lost just two of 111 Olympic games, both to teams which spoke Russian, and one of which (the 1972 final in Munich) was such a patent larceny it should hardly count. The Americans had never lost in a preliminary round.
The present collection has not only lost to a team representing a tiny US protectorate with a population of just four million, but been life-and-death with Greece. It became clear the team over which Brown had been called upon to preside wasn't a team at all, but rather, a bunch of guys dressed in the same clothes.
Brown was named to his post nearly two years ago, when he was still coaching the Philadelphia 76ers. Between then and now he resigned his post in the City of Brotherly Love, took up a new one in Detroit, and this summer guided the Pistons to victory over the vaunted Los Angeles Lakers in the NBA finals.
It was widely assumed Brown left Philadelphia at least in part to put some distance between himself and troublesome guard Allen Iverson, but when he was handed the list of players he would be taking to Athens, Iverson's name was atop the list.
It is almost as if the 2004 team had been created by a marketing maven with no sense of basketball tactics: There is an abundance of stars, but few superstars, many of whom elected to remain at home. There are no ball-handlers and, the truth be told, no pure shooters.
In the absence of pure long-range marksmen, the Americans' three-point shooting woes have been evident. After going 3-for-24 against Puerto Rico, the US were only marginally better at 4-for-21 against Greece. "Believe it or not, we will hit an outside shot one of these nights before this tournament is over," said Brown.
But the sloppy indifference with which the Americans have played in their first two outings hardly bodes well for their Olympic future.
When Brown was asked about his team's revived medal hopes after Tuesday night's win, he pointed out, correctly, "Right now we're 1-and-1. We shouldn't even be thinking about a medal. What we need to do is to get better."
That the rest of the world has been rapidly catching up with the Americans may have surprised Iverson and his millionaire friends, but it was not exactly startling to Brown - or to a few of his more observant charges.
"The first day we got together as a group we talked about respecting our opponents and realising that these guys had played together, realising that the game has gotten better all over the world, and trying to understand how important it is for them to represent their country, and play the right way," said Brown.
"Basketball is probably my generation's soccer," said forward Lamar Odom. "Basketball is played all over the world and watched all over the world now. You've got kids eight, nine years old playing for their national teams and hoping to come over and play in the NBA.
"Kids in Europe turn pro at 13 or 14. They have schools where they get eight hours of basketball a day. So I'm definitely not surprised. They put just as much work into the game as we do," said Odom. "And remember, some of these teams have been playing together for six our seven years. This is only our second or third week playing together."
Brown would quickly point out, and already has, he had virtually no say in deciding the components of the team he was handed, and for that matter, the squad the US brought to Greece isn't even the one NBA commissioner David Stern and the USA Basketball moguls would have chosen.
Before the invitations even went out, Shaquille O'Neal, Ben Wallace, Richard Hamilton, and Shawn Kemp, at least a few of whom voiced "safety concerns", said they weren't interested. Kobe Bryant was in limbo, a courtroom date for a sexual assault charge hanging over his head, while Kevin Garnett was getting married and not anxious to spend his honeymoon in Greece. Jason Kidd, Mike Bibby, Karl Malone, and Tracy McGrady, were all selected, but backed out.
"From our perspective, the only thing we can do is find out what we're made of," said Brown. "This is a great opportunity for a group of guys to get together and figure out what it truly means to be a team. I'm anxious to see if we'll be able to do that." Next up for the US is Australia this afternoon, with a game against unbeaten Lithuania looming on the horizon Saturday night. This could get worse before it gets better.