Some things in life are hard to understand. Last week, for example, we were troubled by Stephen Hawking's revised theory on black holes. After years of thinking otherwise, Hawking declared that information about matter drawn into the heart of a black hole does gradually leak back into our universe, albeit in a scrambled form.
Theoretical physics isn't the strong point of anyone at Tour Headquarters, but after reading a transcript of Hawking's RDS lecture several times, we felt we had the idea.
Understanding how Ian McGonigle won this week's Golf Masters prize by a record margin is proving far more difficult. At the start of the season, the Dublin manager picked his Bobby's Best selection and he hasn't touched the line-up since. After Week 17 they ranked 3,175th on our leaderboard and their prospects for our week 18 tournaments, the Nissan Irish Open and the US Bank Championship, were decidedly bleak.
Their most expensive player, Ernie Els, was on a week off. The Irish member of the team, Paul McGinley, had missed the cut in five of his previous 12 tournaments and was on a downer after fading from a good start at the British Open. Among all the Frenchmen playing well at the moment, McGonigle was stuck with Raphael Jacquelin, who had missed the cut, retired or been disqualified in nine of 15 tournaments. Peter Fowler had played the weekend at only three of 13 events and recently carded an 85 at the European Open and an 82 at the Scottish Open. Paul Broadhurst hadn't won for almost 10 years. Brett Rumford had four missed cuts and a disqualification in seven events. Brandel Chamblee is working full time for The Golf Channel and hasn't earned a Golf Masters cent all season.
To put it bluntly, if Bobby's Best had disappeared down a black hole, nobody, not even Steven Hawking, would have noticed.
Miraculously, the planets suddenly fell into alignment and the team of underachievers racked up Week 18 winnings of 469,500. That was 94,875 ahead of second-placed Bronko, managed by Eileen Waters, which is the biggest winning margin this season and possibly the biggest in Golf Masters history.
McGonigle, who won a Republic of Ireland under-18 soccer cap in 1977, is a 19-handicap member of Beaverstown and is delighted with the prospect of bringing three guests for a fourball plus lunch at the Heritage. It's amazing how many of our winners include their fathers-in-law in the fourball. It must be a way of staying on-side with non-golfing spouses, so Paddy Hayes can expect a call soon.
It was an awesome performance by Bobby's Best, named after McGonigle's seven-year-old son, and it lifted them to 607th overall. But it could have been bettered. The legitimate combination of Rumford, Broadhurst, McGinley, Jacquelin, Padraig Harrington, Andrew Oldcorn and James Kingston would have netted any manager an other-worldly €642,250. Aliens will emerge from a black hole before anyone wins that much. The week 18 average was just €83,713.
