"Who's the father of the child?"

- West Ham fans question the parentage of Victoria Adams's baby, due in three month's time. Adams, aka Posh Spice, is the girlfriend of Manchester United's David Beckham.

"What a load of rubbish . . . Sack the board . ..We want our Tottenham back."

- Spurs fans hint that they're less than happy, following yesterday's 3-0 home defeat by Sheffield Wednesday.

"He's French, he's blonde, he's won the Coup de Monde, Emmanuel, Emmanuel."

- Arsenal fans pay homage to midfielder Emmanuel Petit.

"Dave Barry, where's your hair? Where's your hair? Dave Barry, Dave Barry, Dave Barry, e, e." (to the tune of `Zombie' by the Cranberries).

["]If ya like Noel Mooney, And ya think he's sexy, Come on City let it show. If ya like Noel Mooney, And ya think he's sexy, Come on City let him know.["] (To the tune of Do Ya Think I'm Sexy by Rod Stewart).

- Courtesy of the Cork City website, `Hoof'.