"We'll score again, don't know where, don't know when, but I know some sunny day we'll score again."

- Everton fans (closet Dame Vera Lynn fans) celebrate their 0-0 draw away to Sheffield Wednesday, the seventh time in 10 Premiership matches this season the team failed to score.

"Do not be mistaken, do not be misled, we're not Scousers, we're from Birkenhead. You can keep your Cathedral and your Pier Head, we are not Scousers, we're from Birkenhead."

- Tranmere fans, celebrating their 4-1 win away to Crewe on Saturday, sick of being called Liverpool's third team, declare Birkenhead's independence.

"You're not famous anymore."

- Lincoln fans rub it in, during Tuesday night's Division Two win over Manchester City.

"You're **** and you're getting worse."

- The same Lincoln fans rub it in some more. City fans just stood there and nodded.