JOHN O'SULLIVANhears of the flanker's relief at being cleared

TACKLE, PENALTY, yellow card, citing; a sequence of events separated by seconds initially and then days, one subsequently acknowledged as flawed, but from the outset until the conclusion the following week, it imprisoned Ireland’s Stephen Ferris in a private torment.

Referee Wayne Barnes interpreted the tackle that the Ireland flanker made on Welsh secondrow Ian Evans as dangerous. Leigh Halfpenny kicked the penalty. Wales won, Ireland lost. Citing commissioner for that Six Nations match Achille Reali decided the Ulsterman had a case to answer. The independent disciplinary committee adjudicated that he did not.

Those are the facts but they lack a human dimension. Yesterday at Carton House, Ferris was asked to reprise and sift through his emotions concerning the incident and then what ensued. He responded with a candour that reflects the honesty with which he plays the game. “Well I think a lot of people didn’t actually realise what the penalty was for, but as soon as I heard the whistle I kind of knew straight away.

“I heard [Wales scrumhalf] Mike Phillips making a bit of a shout about it. I could have got up and made a bit of a song and dance about it. But I just felt so low because I knew where we were on the pitch. I knew it was straight in front of the posts and Leigh [Halfpenny] was kicking well all day so he was going to kick the points.

“I felt pretty sad. The penalty had been given and I thought, ‘right, okay,’ and then I saw Wayne Barnes looking at me going [come hither finger gesture] and I went: ‘what’s going on here, I feel crap and you’re about to make me feel worse by showing me yellow’.

“I walked off and there were so many things running through my mind. I didn’t think it was appropriate to be giving the referee a hard time. I just got on with it, sucked it up and walked off. Peter O’Mahony gave me a slap on the back and said: ‘Stevie, these things happen, don’t worry about it’.

“When I made the tackle I thought it was fine and I think the majority of people did too; it’s one of those things, the referee has to make a decision where he sees it from. Had he been on the other side of the ruck, I think there wouldn’t have been anything said about it, but these things happen.

“Deccie [Kidney] spoke to me after the game and said, ‘Don’t let this affect you; you’re playing some great rugby. You’ve been playing great week in, week out for Ulster and we just want you to do the same thing for Ireland the next time you pull on the jersey’.

“I pushed it to the back of my mind. The citing was just another kick in the teeth. Getting penalised ended up costing us the game and then getting cited and travelling over there, it was just a nightmare. When I was cleared and the decision was made that it was the wrong decision, it was good that I could forget about it, know that I hadn’t done anything wrong, and push on.”

Ferris spoke of having the sensation that a massive weight had descended on his shoulders in the instant the penalty was awarded. He explained: “Every fan was sitting there with two or three minutes to go thinking Ireland were going to win, then I give away a penalty and we lose the game.

“Obviously a lot of fans out there think Stephen Ferris made the wrong decision and Stephen Ferris has cost us a win at home in the Six Nations. Some other people would think differently but, yeah, there was that feeling.”

He described the disciplinary hearing, sitting there, watching the incident from a variety of angles. He listened to Barnes give his version by phone.

The ruling was a vindication of sorts. So, too, a suggestion that he’d been unfortunate. It’s not contained in the official transcript of the disciplinary hearing but Ferris pointed out: “We gave our side of the story and at the end of it they were like, ‘I’m sorry, the wrong decision probably ended up costing you the game.’ ”

Did somebody actually say that? “Yeah, so at that stage we just walked out and that was it.”

When appraised that the official transcript of the hearing didn’t contain those sentiments, that the referee had made the wrong decision, he confirmed that he hadn’t read it but added: “No, I wasn’t aware of that; but I wouldn’t sit here and tell you lies.”

All he wants now is an opportunity to play rugby. “I am just looking forward to getting back out onto the pitch. Yes, what happened a couple of weeks ago; I’ll probably still think about for the rest of my career but there is nothing that can be done about it. It’s in the past now.”