"News that former Welsh great John Charles is suffering from Alzheimer's disease brings back a memory of . . ."

David Mellor in his London Evening Standard column.

"Their away record is instantly forgettable. The 5-1 defeat and 7-nil defeat spring to mind." BBC Radio 5 Live commentator, as quoted by Private Eye.

"We have to be careful not to let our game not be the game we know it should be." Paul Ince, another Private Eye pearl.