Next time say nothing

Sometimes there are things better left unsaid. Mary Hannigan has compiled the best misjudged statements of 2004

Sometimes there are things better left unsaid. Mary Hannigan has compiled the best misjudged statements of 2004

1. DINNY CAHILL (Antrim hurling manager)

What'd he say? "We are going to win on Sunday. I think we can also win the All-Ireland. I have never been as confident of winning any game as I am about this one. We have our homework done."

Did he stop there? Oh no.

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"Cork must be in trouble if they have brought Brian Corcoran back. He's finished - and he'll definitely be finished after Sunday. They've been struggling to get scores all year and they have a dreadful centre forward (Niall McCarthy)."

What was he on about? Antrim's All-Ireland quarter-final against Cork.

Result: Cork trounced Antrim 2-26 to 0-10. And you can guess who scored both goals. Yep, Brian Corcoran.

2. JAKE WHITE  (South African rugby coach)

What'd he say? "If I had to pick from the Irish team, maybe the locks and (Brian) O'Driscoll would probably be the three men. (Paul) O'Connell and (Malcolm) O'Kelly are good lock forwards. I'm not saying both of them would necessarily take Bakkies (Botha) and Victor's (Matfield) place, but if you are picking a squad of 22 I'd say those two locks would be there or there about . . . but I doubt if any of the other players would make it."

What was he on about? In the build-up to the game against Ireland at Lansdowne Road, he was replying to a question about how many of the Irish side would be good enough to make the South African squad.

Result: Ireland 17, South Africa 12. How many Irish now, Jake? "Well, if that was a trial game I would have picked all 15 Irish players to go on tour tomorrow."

3. CLIVE TYLDESLEY (ITV football commentator)

What'd he say? "The England fans will be talking about their 1-0 win over France in Lisbon for many years to come."

And: "As manager of Tottenham (Jacques) Santini will have 'One-nil to the Eng-er-land' sung at him at every Premiership ground next season."

What was he on about? With the game in injury time England were leading France 1-0 in their Euro 2004 group game, and Clive indulged in a little fate-tempting.

Result: France won 2-1. Zinedine Zidane scored from a free-kick in the 90th minute and converted a penalty in the 93rd.

4. PAUL CASEY (European Ryder Cup golfer)

What'd he say? "Oh, we properly hate them (the American Ryder Cup team). Americans can be bloody annoying. Sometimes they infuriate me. In Scottsdale (Arizona, where he has a home) it's not so bad because the people there have travelled and you can have civilised conversations with them. But the vast majority of Americans simply don't know what is going on."

What was he on about? He was attempting to explain why he was so keen for Europe to beat the Americans in the Ryder Cup.

Result: The Daily Mirror ran the interview under the headline "Americans are stupid. I hate them, says Paul Casey." Casey, who will be playing on the USPGA Tour next season, promptly received a torrent of abusive e-mails and was dropped by his sponsors Titleist.

5. GORAN IVANISEVIC (tennis player)

What'd he say? "I am so excited about becoming a father, it will be the biggest and best thing to ever happen to me in my life, I cannot wait for my baby to be born."

What was he on about? The birth of his first child in 2003.

Result? "It's great, but there is one problem. She doesn't sleep. At night she seems to turn into a vampire. She wakes up every night five or 10 times, asking for things, singing, calling out. If she only wakes up five times in a night, it's like I've won the lottery. I'm awake at night and asleep during the day.

"I haven't found a way to keep her asleep. I tried yelling, but if I yell it gets even worse, she starts to cry and scream even more."

6. HAL SUTTON (US Ryder Cup captain)

What'd he say? "You know, you've got to look a guy like that in the eye when he says, 'Thank you', and you can tell if it's sincere. They boiled with the sincerity in their eyes. It was boiling. It wasn't lukewarm."

What was he on about? Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson's reaction when he told them he was pairing them on the first day of the Ryder Cup, the first time they had ever played together in the competition. Sutton took the decision because "I felt like history needed it, I felt like the fans needed it, and most of all, I felt like Phil Mickelson and Tiger Woods needed it".

Result? Woods and Mickelson lost both their matches on the opening day, the first to Colin Montgomerie and Padraig Harrington, the second to Darren Clarke and Lee Westwood after they had been three up after four holes. The critics' conclusion was that the pair were incompatible and the "boiling" Sutton saw in their eyes was fury over having to play together.

7. David Beckham

What'd he say? "It was deliberate. I am sure some people think that I have not got the brains to be that clever, but I do have the brains."

What was he on about? Deliberately getting himself booked against Wales so that he would be suspended for the trip to Azerbaijan, a game he was going to miss any way because of a broken rib.

Result? The furore that followed his admission, and the campaign in some quarters to have him stripped of the England captaincy, left Beckham wondering if he was quite as brainy as he hoped he was.

8. Carmelo Anthony (US Olympic basketball team)

What'd he say? "We're guaranteeing a gold medal. We're bringing it back."

What was he on about? The probability of the Americans winning basketball gold in Athens - they had won gold in every Olympics since 1992 when NBA players started competing.

Result? After losing to Puerto Rico in their opening game, 92-73 (by common consent one of the greatest upsets in Olympic history), Lithuania and then Argentina in the semi-finals, Anthony brought home a bronze. As his team-mate Lamar Odom put it, "Once you're a little bit too cocky it comes back to kick you in the balls, excuse my language."

9. Quaker (porridge makers)

What'd they say? "It helps you go the distance."

What were they on about? This was the slogan they intended using in a post-Olympic advertising campaign for Oatso Simple porridge starring Paula Radcliffe, one that would show her winning a marathon.

Result? Well, you know what happened at the Olympics. Radcliffe didn't go the distance in either the marathon or the 10,000 metres. Quaker dropped the idea for the campaign.

10. Roddy Collins (Shamrock Rovers manager)

What'd he say? "This is a massive challenge but I've been there before in situations like this and it's not one that I'll shirk from."

What was he on about? His determination not to shirk from the challenge, on his appointment as manager in June, of leading Dublin City to safety in their relegation battle.

Result? With a handful of games to go Collins left Dublin City for their relegation rivals Shamrock Rovers. As an unnamed Dublin City player put it, "I've heard of rats deserting a sinking ship, but the captain?"