Judging purely on their output, it seems unlikely that those who dream up the narky wheezes that characterise Brisbane's Courier-Mail newspaper are familiar with the phrase "hostage to fortune". But when, as a last throw of the pre-Test dice, they decided to lampoon Stuart Broad by urging the Australian crowd to ignore "the smug Pommie cheat" while themselves referring to him only as "a 27-year-old English medium pace bowler", they left themselves open to even more ridicule when it comes to reporting the first day of the Ashes series.
For this was not just England’s day, it belonged to Broad. In the furnace of the Gabba, on one of the best batting surfaces any of the old stagers around the place could remember here, Broad took the first four wickets as the Australia batsmen, with a heady mixture of nerves and incompetence, surrendered theirs.
Later, towards evening, and armed with the second new ball, he returned to bowl Mitchell Johnson through the gate for a fifth wicket just when he and the combative wicketkeeper Brad Haddin were pulling their side back into the match with a century stand for the seventh wicket.
As his team celebrated, Broad raised the ball aloft in the manner introduced by Glenn McGrath, and for the most part received plaudits rather than boos and catcalls.
With Jimmy Anderson, worthy as ever not to say unlucky, and Chris Tremlett, hulking but little more than medium-fast, chipping in with a further wicket apiece during a dominant middle session for England, Australia at one point had sunk to 132 for six and were facing embarrassment in what is regarded as their citadel.
A second wicket for Anderson towards the close meant that Broad was able to lead the team from the field with the scoreboard reading 273 for eight and his bowling figures showing as five for 65.
Only in the final session, when the ball had softened and the earlier bounce dampened, did Haddin and Johnson look like hauling Australia back into the match. Three years ago Haddin made 136 here against England to place his side in a dominant position from which they should have gone on to win. His sixth-wicket stand of 307 with Mike Hussey first dug his side out of a hole and then pressed home an advantage gained by his own bowlers on the opening day.
This time, with careful defence and some judicious strokes – batting to shame the top order – he saw off the bowling: first Broad, then Anderson and Tremlett, and all the while ticking over against Graeme Swann, who booked in at the Stanley Street end and wheeled away without success for much of the afternoon.
Haddin finished unbeaten on 78, with seven fours and a six. If Swann chose to give one a little more air, or pushed one a smidgeon further up, Haddin lofted the ball down the ground with a free swing of the bat, twice clearing the rope.
Until Broad nailed him with an inswinger, Johnson had played an admirable foil for almost two and a half hours, making 64.
The morning session had all but gone to Australia until the final minutes even though Chris Rogers had been caught in the gully from the splice early-on to give Broad his first wicket. Then David Warner and Shane Watson had threatened to lay the foundations of the sort of score the pitch demanded from the side winning the toss and batting first. Instead, the complexion of the match changed in 20 overs either side of lunch, when five wickets fell for 61 runs.
Watson began the collapse by hanging his bat out tamely to be caught at second slip, and then, immediately after the interval, Michael Clarke, not for the first time, found Broad's aggression and bounce too much and was taken at short leg. When Warner then slapped Broad crookedly to extra-cover, Australia were already in considerable trouble. George Bailey nibbled nervously on his debut and was taken at slip and then Steve Smith, as with Watson, hung his bat limply and edged to first slip.
Guardian Service
