Pub quiz aficionados? What have Richard Dunne, Graham Coughlan, Mickey Evans, David Worrell and Phil Babb got in common? They're the only players on our Republic of Ireland "men abroad" list to have won league championship medals this season (Colin Healy didn't play enough games to get a medal at Celtic and we're assuming, even though it kills us, that Arsenal will deny Keane and Co at Manchester United this week).
McCarthy's men abroad
Boavista's 2-1 defeat by Benfica clinched Sporting Lisbon their 18th Portuguese league title and Babb's first, thus winning him a place alongside Manchester City's Dunne (right) and the Plymouth trio in our 2001-02 hall of fame. Meaty slaps on the back to all.
And a big well done to Stoke City's James O'Connor (Bray born and bred) whose goal in the final minute of normal time levelled the DivisionTwo play-off semi-final against Cardiff, before his extra-time free-kick was deflected home to put Stoke through to next Saturday's final against Brentford.
Finally, best of luck to Tranmere's Sean Thornton who now appears to be enemy number one in the Merseyside region after he rejected his club's record-breaking contract offer and agreed to sign for Sunderland on a Bosman free transfer (although, because he's only 18, Tranmere will be entitled to compensation). Tranmere are gutted, Sunderland are tickled.
Next season Peter Reid could well field a team that includes Thornton, Niall Quinn, Jason McAteer, Kevin Kilbane, Michael Reddy, Thomas Butler, and maybe even Clifford Byrne. The greening of the Stadium of Light, eh?
Booking a fight in advance
On Thursday, we read a damn good giggle of a story on Football365 about an email sent to an English supporter by a Japanese hotel in Sapporo where England will be playing Argentina in the World Cup. After confirming the supporter and his pal's booking, the hotel's e-mail read:
The day 2 Argentina will stay at the same hotel. So please be careful not to have a fight with them. (Of course, I believe you and your friend. But sorry if I made you angry about the above. As you know, it's first time that World cup will be held in Japan and we Japanese are now too nervous).
Hardly had we the yarn read when this arrived in Planet Football's e-mail inbox: "I'm the Englishman referred to in the story below (Football 365 piece attached). The Irish guys I'm working with in Dublin suggested I send it on to you," wrote James Baker. So, naturally, we grilled James about his hooliganism credentials but he reassured us that he'd be "as careful as possible not to - accidentally or otherwise - have a fight in Japan". He didn't, however, promise not to spend the night before the game setting off fire-crackers outside Juan Sebastian Veron's bedroom door or stink-bombs outside Javier Saviola's room. If either looks off-colour for the big game we'll know who to blame.
Player/manager trivia
We offer our profuse apologies in advance for this but one of Planet Football's colleagues wickedly suggested that we put this little teaser to you: Name the three footballers in England's Premiership who have the same surname as their managers' christian names - eg "John Smith" (manager) and "Stern John" (player).
It took us a day to get the first, three days to get the second (not helped by the fact that the names are spelt differently) and we gave up on the third. When our colleague put us out of our misery we were tempted to head-butt him - it's evil.
Quotes of the week
"I'm not being picked (for the England squad) and I don't know why. It seems there is more to it than anybody knows. There's another agenda."
- Lee Bowyer. Will we tell him or will you?
"In a way it is like preparing for an earthquake, or any other natural disaster."
- Hiroshi Nakada, the mayor of Yokohama (where Ireland play Saudi Arabia on June 11th), looking forward to the influx of western football hooligans this summer.
"Everybody thinks they have the prettiest wife at home."
- Arsene Wenger (left) after Alex Ferguson claimed that Manchester United are better than Arsenal. And that his Daddy's car is bigger than Arsene's daddy's car and..
"I insist I am 100 per cent committed to this. The people don't want a big, furry seven-foot monkey, they want somebody who is serious, who is best for the town."
- Hartlepool mascot H'Angus the Monkey, after being elected mayor of the town.
"This is a dream come true. This is a time for cigarettes and drink."
- Bayer Leverkusen boss Klaus Toppmoller parties on down on Tuesday night.
"You just wish you had 10 Roy Keanes."
- Alex Ferguson after Tuesday's mishap. Eleven would be better, Alex.
"The English have a very high opinion about themselves..their press usually adopt a highly entertaining approach and I am already looking forward to read their papers tomorrow."
- Greece coach Otto Rehhagel celebrates Leverkusen's Champions' League triumph.
"If Arsenal think they can rub our noses in it by claiming the title in our backyard then they had better think again."
- Ryan Giggs all but guarantees that Arsenal will win the title at Old Trafford on Wednesday night.
Street soccer fan
Loved this. Martin Chilton of the London Evening Standard inexplicably found himself leafing through the Conservative Party's magazine Heartland last week when he stumbled upon a feature on Paul West, the Tory candidate in the Ipswich by-election last November. "As a schoolboy I played at every opportunity," declared West, "and I still go to watch Ipswich at Portland Road". A die-hard fan then, although he'd see a lot more Ipswich action at Portman Road.
We. . I mean they are losing
Onefootball.com had a pearly peach of a story last week about a football commentator on Yugoslav television channel KBN. Our man was working on the Partizan Belgrade v Red Star Belgrade game and tried, but failed pitifully, to hide his allegiances.
After Red Star converted their complete control of the game into a 3-0 lead the commentator barely uttered another word, declaring, when the ball hit the back of the net: "This is shit".
Planet Football (the Moon)
French newspaper L'Equipe's World Cup special - profile of Damien Duff. Place of birth: Ballyboden (England). If you want to write to them their headquarters are in Paris (Germany).
Football on TV
Wednesday: Feyenoord v Borussia Dortmund (UEFA Cup final), BBC2, 7.45; Manchester United v Arsenal, Sky Sports 1, 8.0.
Sunday: Birmingham v Norwich (Division One Play-off final), UTV, 3.30; Aberdeen v Celtic, Sky Sports 1, 3.0.
