Compiled by Mary Hannigan.
Prospect keeping check on age gap
WE RECEIVED an email last week from a distressed chap by the name of Gary, the source of his anguish the inclusion of Crystal Palace's Sean Scannell in Giovanni Trapattoni's 40-man squad for next month's training camp in Portugal.
"It's not that I have anything against Scannell," he wrote, "he seems to be a great prospect, but his call-up just makes me feel depressingly old: he wasn't even born when we were playing in Italia '90."
Good Lord, he's right . . . Well, we think he is. According to the Palace website Scannell, whose father Brendan is from Castleblaney, was born on March 21st, 1989, but everywhere else has him down as a September 17th, 1990 baby.
We found it hard coping with Paul McShane's revelation that he was four when Italia '90 was on, but this? We share your pain Gary.
Quotes of the week
"He was always a mummy's boy, being a single child. He is tender like a mimosa flower."
- There's Fabio Capello, building up a hard-man image so his England players will be too afraid to misbehave, and along comes his Ma, Evelina, with this.
"If I had had my hair cut last week we would have lost 1-0."
- David James after Michael Owen's volley clipped his hair-do on Saturday and flashed over the bar.
"The main thing is to learn to understand the local players like Gerrard and Carragher. They speak with some peculiar local accent and sometimes I have absolutely no clue what the guys are saying. Many foreign players have the same problem."
- Liverpool's Andriy Voronin is learning English, he just wishes Stevie and Jamie would too.
"As a player you think 'f**k, we came back to 2-2, we had a good chance and we lost'. Sorry about the language but you must know what I mean . . . then I saw the penalty had been given and I was like oooofff."
- Emmanuel Adebayor after Arsenal's Champion League hopes went oooofff at Anfield.
"You need an English backbone - one with that force, that togetherness, that pulling together. That's what the English players have. It's why Arsenal might come up short in the run-in."
- John Terry hinting that Arsene Wenger's lads lack a bit of the bulldog spirit.
"I like the number four."
- Eric Cantona after attending last week's Champions League game at Old Trafford. He was impressed with midfielder Owen Hargreaves, he just didn't know his name.
Jens Lehmann: "I don't find it very funny being forced to sit on the bench for a man who didn't start playing until he was 30. I am very angry."
Manuel Almunia: "To have someone here who hates me is just amazing. I know he hates me. Every morning I wake up I know it is going to be the same. I've had to put up with it every day since he was out of the team and even before then."
- The Lehmann/Almunia love-in gathers pace.
Dahl miscues but still hits target
IN HIS one season with Coventry back in 2000, Andreas Dahl didn't make much of an impact, but according to The Observerhe certainly did when playing for Danish club Nordsjalland last week - just ask the streaker who ran on to the pitch during the game against AaB.
"I know it's the stewards' job, but why shouldn't I be allowed to kick him in the balls," said Dahl after the game. "I just stuck out a leg and hit him straight in his special area. I guess it was a bit unfortunate for him, but it wasn't as if I was aiming. He sure went down fast."
And with that the streaker left the pitch half the man he used to be.
More quotes of the week
"I think it is a yes or no question and I am not going to give you a yes or no answer."
- Chelsea chairman Bruce Buck when asked if Avram Grant would be in charge next season.
"There is always going to be talk about players moving on. Talk is cheap until someone picks the phone up or speaks to the chairman about a player. I haven't had anyone say 'listen, can we do a deal for x, y or z next season?'."
- Paul Jewell's had no offers for Derby players. Go 'way.
"Anyone who thinks we are just seeing out our season is wrong. Our bonus structure is geared to finishing in the top 10."
- West Ham manager Alan Curbishley. It's the loot, then, that keeps their season bubbling.
"At United the other players call me 'The Lion' because I never take care of my hair - I just show up at training wearing it however it is when I get out of bed."
- Carlos Tevez ruling himself out as a successor to David "because I'm worth it" Ginola.
The Italian job
IF WE had to describe the key moment in the Manchester United v Roma game it would have gone like: "Daniele De Rossi blazed his penalty attempt over the bar."
Gazzetta dello Sport? "Something happened that grips you in the stomach, something which clouds your mind, which weakens your knees: Fear. Fear of missing, fear of not achieving, fear of carrying too much responsibility on your shoulders. And De Rossi, who looked like a man condemned to torture as he went up to the penalty spot, missed."
