TV VIEW:WELL, AT least there was one triumph for Irish rugby on Saturday, and, frankly, after his majestic display in the extreme ironing section of the competition it would have been a travesty, with all due respect to Jessica Kuerten, if Peter Clohessy wasn't crowned ICA Bootcamp Recruit of the Year.

Some might argue that, at 45, The Claw is a bit long in the tooth to earn a recall for next month’s World Cup in New Zealand, but if they’d seen how he swivelled those hips of his while he expertly de-wrinkled those garments, they might be forced in to a re-think.

And rugby, as any expert would tell you, is all about hip-swivelling.

Seriously, if the iron-wielding Clohessy had broken in to “I’m all shook up uh huh, oooh yeah, yeah” . . . you wouldn’t have blinked. The King isn’t dead at all, last week, at least, he was alive and well in Termonfeckin.

A Clohessy-less Declan Kidney, of course, has a few problems of his own to iron out after that less than encouraging run-out against the French when the Gallic invaders hip-swivelled their way to victory, leaving their hosts itching like a man on a fuzzy tree.

The important thing, of course, is not to panic, after all there are three whole weeks for fine tuning before that World Cup meeting with the US of A.

“We are in deep, deep doo-doo!” Okay, George Hook was in panic mode, although there are those who would argue it’s the only mode he knows.

Brent Pope and Conor O’Shea, though, weren’t much more buoyant, while up in the commentary box Ralph Keyes had noted that Ireland’s performance had “gone off the edge of a cliff” after the opening 20 minutes.

That class of talk hardly raised World Cup countdown spirits, although Brian O’Driscoll was more reassuring when he spoke to Tracy Piggott after the game.

“How are the lads in there?” she asked.

“They’re tired, but they’re not dead,” he replied, so that was something.

The panel still wasn’t comforted, though, and, when Tom McGurk asked them to name their 30-player squad for the World Cup, George appeared to want to leave everyone at home – including Declan Kidney.

The only upside of that proposition, really, is that we’d be spared Ireland’s Call, there really wouldn’t be much point in our New Zealand hosts playing the pesky ditty if there was divil an Irish player on the field, but, aside from that, sending no one at all would surely leave our hopes of getting out of the pool in even deeper doo-doo?

But need it be said, the good thing about this level of despair is that expectations are somewhat lowered ahead of the World Cup, hopefully prompting the mother-of-all ‘we’ll-show-ya’ backlashes from our much maligned players.

Ask Kerry. Yesterday they ended a calamitous drought, reaching their first All-Ireland semi-final since way back in 2009. Last year, you’ll recall, they were ousted in the quarter-finals by Down, prompting speculation that the team was done and dusted.

Still, when they arrived in Croke Park yesterday for just their 11th semi-final in 12 seasons, Michael Lyster reminded us that “there are All-Ireland medals falling out of their pockets”. And barring a hiccup against Dublin/Donegal next month . . . well, they’d want to be deep pockets.

“Ah, quicksilver, he has dancing feet,” Colm O’Rourke purred when Lyster asked him for a word on Colm Cooper’s hip-swivellingly marvellous display. Pat Spillane crowned him the greatest player of all time – the Gooch, not Colm – and although Joe Brolly’s furrowed brow suggested he wanted to argue Pat’s point, as he’s often tempted to do, yesterday wasn’t really the day to do it.

A couple of Manchester City players, incidentally, prompted a purring outbreak yesterday too, Ray ‘my word!’ Wilkins left weak-kneed at the sight of Carol Tevez warming up on the touchline at Bolton.

“Time for Tevez,” asked Martin Tyler.

“I would think so,” Ray gasped. “Half an hour of the little man would be very pleasant.”

Come full-time, though, Sky’s guest pundit Kevin Phillips was busy purring over City’s David Silva.

“Everything they do goes through Silva, he’s just impossible to mark because as a defender you don’t know whether to go in up his backside or just drop off. He’s unplayable,” he said.

That’s pretty much how Mayo’s rearguard probably felt about the Gooch yesterday, the fella unplayable in spells due to his ability to strike while the iron was hot. In that sense, he has an awful lot in common with Peter Clohessy.

“Still, when Kerry arrived in Croke Park yesterday for just their 11th semi-final in 12 seasons, Michael Lyster reminded us that “there are All-Ireland medals falling out of their pockets”. And barring a hiccup against Dublin/Donegal next month . . . well, they’d want to be deep pockets.