"This is even crazier than when Daniel O'Donnell was here."

- A Manchester bookshop manager after the crowd went wild upon seeing David Beckham arrive to sign his new book.

"No - there's fog on the channel and we are an island society." - Chelsea coach Claudio Ranieri's reply when asked if he missed Italy. Eh?

"The first half was end-to-end stuff. In contrast, in this second half it's been one end to the other."

- Lou Macari on TalkSport.

"He hasn't been the normal Paul Scholes today, and he's not the only one."

- Alvin Martin on TalkSport.

"Yeah, I was a bit anxious when I got to the stadium, but in all fairness if I hadn't been anxious I'd have been worried."

- Leeds goalkeeper Paul Robinson on his European debut against Besiktas.

"So when I hear a few actors pretend they come from Mars, it makes me think."

- Eric Cantona . . . we were going to try and explain the context of the quote but life's much too short.

"In terms of arrogance those comments are strange, coming out of a country like Holland - because I don't think you are short of that yourself. You level that at Manchester United when nobody else ever has."

- Err, earth to Alex Ferguson?