GEOFF Shreeves was in exalted company yesterday, trending alongside Rupert Murdoch and Justin Bieber on Twitter. He was starring on YouTube too, by the middle of the day there were over 40 videos featuring the Sky Sports reporter’s chat with Branislav Ivanovic after Chelsea’s Champions League game on Tuesday.
Lest you’ve been in hiding:
Shreeves: “Can you clear one thing up for us? Were you booked after the penalty?”
Ivanovic: “Yeah, I was.”
Shreeves: “You know that means you’re out of the final now?”
Ivanovic: “Yeah? I don’t know?”
Shreeves: “Unfortunately that means you DON’T play in the final.”
Now, you’d imagine Ivanovic might already have known that his booking meant he’d miss the final, but it seemed the Serb wasn’t entirely sure, his face bearing the look of a child who’d just been told his puppy had been flattened by a truck.
A Twitterer by the name of Tropical picked up the theme with his version of the exchange:
“Branislav, your dog is dead.”
“Yes, is dead.”
“You know your dog is dead?”
“Yes.”
“And that you will never, EVER see him again?”
“Is true.”
If it was, say, John Terry who’d been dealt with in a less than sensitive manner by Shreeves there might well have been dancing in the streets, but Ivanovic? Oh, the face. Bambi-ish.
The Guardian’s Scott Murray was not amused, accusing Shreeves of showing “numbing joylessness” in “possibly the most tactless interview in TV history”, reckoning he relished breaking the bad news.
Meanwhile, Bart Simpson entered the fray on YouTube, playing back the interview and declaring: “You can actually pinpoint the second when his heart rips in half . . . now!”
So, was it the most insensitive moment from a sports reporter in the history of time? Well, it was up there, maybe. But it will always be hard to beat the story recounted by American sports writer Bud Shaw about a press conference with Oakland Raiders quarterback Jim Plunkett before the 1981 Super Bowl.
Plunkett was asked about his parents, the player speaking “in low, respectful tones about growing up in a special needs household, that his mother was blind and that his father, also blind, had passed away”.
A reporter from the Philadelphia tried to jump in with a follow-up question, but kept getting beaten to it by colleagues. About five questions later, when the subject had moved on from Plunkett’s parents, he piped up: “Jimmy, Jimmy? I want to make sure I have this right: was it dead mother, blind father or blind mother, dead father?”
Tweets
“Everyone thinks I’m cruel for dumping my girlfriend by text. She’s lucky, plan A was to get Geoff Shreeves to tell her.”
“We’ve got Shaun Wright-Phillips here. Shaun, great goal today. What does it feel like to be adopted?”
“Geoff Shreeves is currently in Africa asking kids “what would you like to be IF you grow up?”.
“Geoff Shreeves is now en route to Vatican City to tell the Pope that God isn’t real.”
“It’s alright kids. Don’t listen to Geoff Shreeves. Santa does exist!” (Lee Westwood)
“Geoff Shreeves has just been on the phone to Cinderella to tell her she’s not going to the ball.”
“I’ve asked Geoff Shreeves to do a short speech at my funeral, just to get the mood going.”
Shreeves: “It’s a shame you won’t be playing in the final?”
Torres: “But I wasn’t booked?”
Shreeves: “Yeah, but you’re hardly going to start.”
“Geoff Shreeves just phoned me to remind me I’m not home from work until 8.30pm and will miss the 1st half of the Madrid game. Cheers Geoff.”
“Geoff Shreeves to Lampard after last night’s match: “Congrats on reaching final Frank, but you do realise ur mother isnt alive to see u play?””
“Shreeves interviewed Torres and told him that had he not scored Chelsea would still have gone through.”
“Some lad in my form came in crying today because Geoff Shreeves had been telling him that the Easter Bunny isn’t real. Poor lad.”
Shreeves: “Also Branislav do you realise that JT got sent off to spend time with your wife and your house has burnt down?”
Ivanovic: “Erm . . . no.”
“I hear Geoff Shreeves has been going around quoting the divorce rate to newly engaged couples.”
“Geoff Shreeves: “Have I got any spare change? Well if I give it to you I won’t have, will I?””
By Mary Hannigan