AGAINST THE ODDS:Family can wait, but Vinny has the serious task of breaking the news of his impending marriage to his drinking buddies in Foley's Bets of the Week Vinny's Bismarck
IT WAS anything but a manic Monday on the streets of Dublin. The city had emptied for the Bank Holiday weekend and traffic was light on the 130 route.
Like many buses of the fleet, the 130 didn't go directly to city centre; instead it embarked on a mazy loop of leafy Clontarf and Dollymount, almost doubling back on itself, before straightening out approaching Fairview.
Those who missed the bus pulling away from the terminus at Clontarf Castle could amble gently down Castle Avenue to the seafront and hop on board a few minutes later.
Dublin Bus was doing its best to serve the community but getting passengers from A to B as quickly as possible wasn't their forte, thought the driver of the 130, a thick-set middle-aged man with a lugubrious expression.
With few passengers to worry about, Vinny Fitzpatrick had time to think. It was time he needed. He was, after all, in unknown territory - he was engaged, betrothed, affianced, or whatever you want to call it.
His decent proposal of marriage to Angie, delivered with a creaking knee and dodgy back in her kitchen over a nightcap a week earlier had, against expectations, been accepted.
First, by a shriek, which didn't impress him at all, and then by a lingering, passionate embrace, which most certainly did.
Since then, Angie had become immersed in a strange world of hotels, honeymoons and hen nights; of cakes, catering and churches. It was almost as if Vinny had been airbrushed out of the picture.
She'd dropped a hint at needing a ring to show off to her friends - "nothing too fancy, mind" - and told Vinny she'd keep him abreast of proceedings. That was it.
They'd barely spoken all week, apart from a quick call from Angie asking whether Vinny was Catholic. "Yes, non-practising," he'd replied.
As for Vinny, he hadn't told his sisters the news, or the lads, for that matter. While Bernie and Mary could wait, the lads couldn't. He'd have to tell them, lest they heard it in Boru Betting first.
That Monday night, the "Fab Five" gathered in Foley's. As Vinny waited for the moment to deliver, he found himself getting caught up in a discourse about the Olympic Games.
It was the same every four years; the lads would speculate how many medals, if any, Ireland might win. They would reflect on the stars of their youth and how for a few days, at least, they would all become experts in such everyday pursuits as softball, sailing and shooting. There had been a time, back in the 1970s, when Vinny could reel off every reigning track-and-field gold medallist and hold his own about the elite boxers and swimmers.
He had been a Citius, Altius, Fortius anorak. Not any more.
He hadn't a clue who the fastest man in the world was and would be hard pushed to pick out Paul Hession or David Gillick in an identity parade. Yet, as a kid, the Olympics had fascinated him. He could still recollect watching the Mexico Games in 1968 with his late dad, Finbarr, on a grainy black-and-white TV in the front room of their mid-terrace artisan home in Clontarf.
He remembered Tommie Smith and John Carlos raising their black-gloved fists, although he had no idea at the time what their actions signified.
In 1972 Mark Spitz and Olga Korbut grabbed the headlines, but Vinny's highlight was Dave Wottle, complete with golf hat and famous throttle, winning the 800 metres.
He cursed when Eamonn Coghlan missed out on a medal in the 1,500 metres in Montreal and giggled when the BBC's David Coleman said "and (Alberto) Juantorena opens his legs and shows his class".
If the Olympics of 1980 and 1984 were about the rivalry of Seb Coe and Steve Ovett, Vinny's outstanding moment was John Treacy's true-grit silver in the marathon, accompanied by an immortal commentary by Jimmy Magee, who listed off all the previous Irish medal winners as the spindly Waterford lad entered the stadium.
He would never forget the relentless courage of Michael Carruth in Barcelona in 1992. While Atlanta in 1996 had been about a girl who didn't deliver on the big stage, Sonia O'Sullivan, and one who did, Michelle Smith.
"At least, Sonia got a silver in Sydney in 2000," he said to himself.
As for Beijing, he didn't think Ireland had a sniff of a gold medal, not on the track anyway. Paddy Power had Ireland at 11 to 8 not to win a medal, which he felt was a great bet.
Maybe the show jumpers or one of the boxers could raise a gallop for the minor placings, but the gap between little ol' Ireland and the rest of the world was like that between the Eircom League and the Champions League - unbridgeable.
As for Beijing, or Peking as our friends across the Irish Sea still sometimes called it, he suspected the Chinese would pull out all the stops to put on a spectacular show.
He knew there were nine million bicycles in Beijing because Katie Melua sang about it, and he'd also picked up a left-field curiosity about the choice of Beijing for the Olympics, which he sprang on his unsuspecting pals just as the credits rolled for The Sunday Game.
"Lads, you know the way the venue for the Olympics is supposed to be about politics. Well, I have a theory it's all about latitude," he said.
The lads stared at Vinny. "Latitude? What are you on about?' asked Macker.
"Latitude," replied Vinny. "Look, Beijing is 39 degrees north of the equator. Well, consider this. Seoul is 37 degrees north; Barcelona is 41, Atlanta 33, Athens 37 while Sydney is 33 degrees south. As the last five Olympics were all around the same latitude, I think it matters more to the IOC heads where you are than who you are."
As Vinny speeches went, this was akin to the Gettysburg Address. There was a silence before Macker spoke: "Vinny there's as much chance of your theory being right as there is of you asking for Angie's hand in marriage."
As the lads had a laugh at their old friend's expense, Vinny seized the moment. "Actually, I've a bit of news for you on that score," he said quietly." Moments later, there was a minor eruption under the telly in the lounge of Foley's. It would be a long night.5pts Ireland to win less than 0.5 medals in Olympics (11/8, Paddy Power)
1pt Darren Clarke to be top European in US PGA (33/1, Betfair)
3pts Lay Rangers to win SPL (Evens, Boylesports, Liability 3pts)
