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Even Larry the cat is exhausted by the Christmas run-up in Westminster

As the year nears its end, Britain’s political machine gets ready for a tumultuous election battle in 2024

Larry the Downing Street cat stalks his territory. Photo: Neil Hall, EPA
Larry the Downing Street cat stalks his territory. Photo: Neil Hall, EPA

Larry the cat’s weary visage said it all. He sat on his haunches just inside the famous black door of 10 Downing Street, ennui written all over his fluffy feline face as yet another festive party came traipsing noisily through his front hall.

A succession of journalists were leaving the prime minister’s annual Christmas drinks for political hacks on Monday evening. Several of them squealed in delight at the sight of Larry, the white and grey tabby who is often seen on television ambling across shot at key political moments.

He is Downing Street’s longest resident, although that isn’t a particularly Herculean feat under the current Tory government, with its penchant for changing prime ministers as often as socks. But still, Larry has served an impressive near-13 years in Number 10. That’s longer than Margaret Thatcher.

As the journalists exited on Monday evening, one by one they reached down to pet Larry’s head as they walked by. He ducked out of the way for some; he reluctantly took it from others. I was one of the last in the group to head out the door. As I approached Larry, I could sense that he’d had enough. He turned his head and looked at me, his eyes narrowing into ovals. Just get out, he seemed to say.

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December was already a frenetic month for the political hordes in Westminster, and that was before any of the myriad festive parties. Matt Hancock, Boris Johnson and Rishi Sunak all appeared at the Covid-19 Inquiry. The Tories reprised their Brexit-era psychodrama for Sunak’s Rwanda immigration legislation. The government also spent the month getting used to the return of David Cameron, who was appointed as foreign secretary in mid-November.

The exhausting merry-go-round of Westminster Christmas parties spun furiously through it all, burning all candles at both ends. Such gatherings are non-stop around parliament at this time of year, sometimes with three or four an evening as recess approaches.

Sunak’s was among the final ones, as journalists covering Westminster gathered upstairs in Number 10 to eat canapés and drink mulled wine with cabinet members and the prime minister, who delivered a few jokes before fleeing.

A 'proper f*****g lunch' with Nigel Farage: 'I musn't be sloshed this evening'Opens in new window ]

There is a key difference between work-social events in London and Dublin, where people generally look at the starting time on an invite card, then decide to show up an hour later than that so they don’t embarrass themselves by being the first to arrive. An Irish party ends when it ends, usually long after the bar staff flash the lights.

In London the gatherings all have designated finishing times and, to the general astonishment of any Irish people present, they tend to stick to them. Everybody shows up on time and leaves on time – 7pm to 9pm, or 6pm to 8.30pm, and so on. It is a wonder.

Of course, the Irish embassy in London’s press and political reception last week was a notable exception. It was officially billed for 6pm to 8pm. Yeah right, said most of the diaspora to themselves.

The event was attended by politicos such as Hilary Benn, Labour’s shadow Northern Ireland secretary, and Sue Gray, the former Newry publican who is also Keir Starmer’s chief of staff. It included a tribute to Shane MacGowan, with emotional renditions of A Rainy Night in Soho and Fairytale of New York. The crowd joined in, the lights came up at 8pm, and the British people there thought that was it.

The crowd simply decamped elsewhere, with most ending up down the street at the Star Tavern in Belgravia. It is the pub where Buster Edwards (played by Phil Collins in the eponymous film) used to meet fellow hood Bruce Reynolds to plan the Great Train Robbery in 1963. The Star Tavern ran out of Guinness during last week’s impromptu Irish after-party, a source of mirth for many present. Political talk flowed just as easily as the beer. Here follows a synopsis of some of it.

Next year’s UK general election campaign will be among the dirtiest in many years, with both the Sunak and Starmer preparing to fight highly personalised campaigns against the other. October still seems the most likely date for it, as it gives Sunak more time to try to get the first deportation flights off to Rwanda, as well as giving him the possibility of officially chalking up two years in office (he took over on October 25th, 2022). Barring some sort of black swan event, such as a war or big scandal in the opposition, Labour should win it handsomely. Black swans are very rare, but not unheard of.

But whether it is Starmer or Sunak hosting next year’s Christmas drinks at 10 Downing Street, their chief mouser Larry will, hopefully, also be there – grumping about it, bored with it, and ready for it all to end.